“FREE KITTEN ALL AGES”

 “DRUG POISON THANKS”

     What do these mean?  What in the world do you imagine the intents could be of the people who spray-painted them?  I am assuming of course that more than one person was involved here. 

     Because both of these noncommunicative messages reared their enigmatic heads in the States of New Jersey and Delaware within the last 12 hours, I could be wrong.  After all, it is possible that one person did them both.

     However, one message was black on white cardboard; one was red on brown cardboard; the “FREE KITTEN” lettering was much more wobbily; and the two signs were about 130 miles apart. 

     So where does that leave us, except: perplexed?  So what?, you say?  Ah, but there’s good reason to wonder if someone short on two colors of spray paint and limited as to choice of cardboard was thankful for having poisoned a kitten with drugs to set it “free,” don’t you think? 

     Oh, right, and it’s entirely plausable that such a depraved individual was perhaps so overcome with emotion at the thought of having to give the poisoned kitten away for free that the shakes took over as she or he lettered the offering. 

     And then, of course, that person would have driven 130 miles —about twenty-seven hours worth in Jersey traffic— just to distance the two signs so no one (except devious me!) would think to connect the freebie-feline-of-all-ages with the expression of gratitude for the drugs that did the nasty deed.  Let’s exercise some imagination (You do remember what that’s like?  Think back to your toddler days!  Sorry, sometimes the sarcasm just runs rampant!) 

     Anyway, supposing the poor dumb cat was unintentionally poisoned, like maybe it ate some bad sushi or something.  And what if the negligent kitten culprit happened to be a some household name athlete or movie star or (unlikely though it may be, and heaven forbid) a politician?  Under such circumstances (risking infamy), it could conceiveably be worth driving the 130 miles to smoke-and-mirror his or herself into New Jersey Turnpike obscurity (or the Sopranos’ summer home in Sea Bright or Sea Girt or Mantoloking . . . or wherever, or, huh, all three plastic towns).

     So, what’s the point here, halalpiar?  Well, maybe it’s not such a good idea to create a message that’s not clear to everyone who sees it (even people as dense as me!) if you’re really serious about what it is that you’re trying to sell . . . or give away, or thank!     halalpiar   

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“They” are “We” 

     All of us are victim to someone or something or some set of circumstances at different points in our lives, yes?  So too are each of us rescuers.  The trick is to minimize involvement with the circumstances that lead to victimization, and to keep ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially strong enough to be able to rescue others when they turn to us, or when we stumble onto them; right?  It’s all about striking a balance within ourselves.

     How can we best achieve this balance most consistently?  The answer is different for each individual.  For some, regular exercise works, or yoga, or Reike, or EFT, or religion, or reading, writing, doing art or craftwork, watching sports, laughing more, enjoying a hobby, listening to music, tending to pets, playing games, traveling, working smarter (not harder), managing time more effectively, getting a massage, taking a shower, going for a walk, rising with the sun, and add your own ideas here about what works best for you.

     The bottom line is that life and living are all about daily stress . . . both good and bad.  We couldn’t sit up in a chair without stress, so it’s not all bad, but when stress turns to DIS-stress (ease to DIS-ease), it becomes nonproductive and harmful to our wellbeing. 

     Negative stress leads us quickly down the path of becoming and playing the role of victims.  Then, when that happns, who do we most want to be knocking at our doors?  Rescuers.  And where do these saintly types come from?  Our families, our circles of friends and neighbors, work associates, community organizations . . . and, sometimes, complete strangers seem to just drop out of the sky in parachutes, first aid kits in hand.

     Well, guess what?  Isn’t it true that “They” are “We” in different circumstances?

     The point is to remember that victims today can be rescuers tomorrow and vice versa, so it pays to always have the mindset of helping others as long as it does not create more stress for you, because you cannot be any help to anyone unless you are coming to the rescue from a position of strength.  Go back to paragraph two.  And remember what your Grandma said (or would have if she could have):           Do unto others . . .      

halalpiar        

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Who’s best to captain  

                                                 

the ship through storms? 

     Whether you’re an athlete, or writing a book, running a business, managing a household or delivering a professional practice service, do you periodically stop to take inventory of your resources and re-visit the reality (or fantasy) of where you’re headed? 

     Do you routinely make adjustments in your products, services and plans, in your approach, in your people and procedures?  Do you strive every day to ensure that your pursuits are realistic and your actions based on experience?  Or do you simply aim in the direction of your wish-list, close your eyes, and hope? 

     “If it ain’t broke, fix it anyway” is the rallying cry of successful entrepreneurs who know the only way to get a leg up in competitive industries and markets is to be making informed and reasonable adjustments consistently.  Note informed and reasonable . . . in a word, experienced.  

     If corporate giants (including the failing financial institutions we’re hearing about) and our incompetent overkill government would take (have taken) a more aggressive stance in questioning the ongoing viability of their policies, strategic plans and actions, they would (have) quickly realize(d) that this planet is not at a point in history where it’s physically/mentally/financially/emotionally affordable for any entity to stand still.   

     Refusing to constantly assess and reassess established directions and commitments constitutes investment in the status quo.  At this time in this world, there is no room for complacency or indifference or ambivalance because the rest of the planet continues to spin relentlessly.  The time for standstill thinking and behavior may in fact never come again. 

     Okay.  So who’s best to captain the ship through storms? 

     The team with management experience and proven abilities to reshape and scale back government, with the track-records of having overcome all odds, with the demonstrated abilities to improvise, innovate, and practice active leadership . . . the team that knows how to read the tides and stars to navigate, and that has the skill and experience to sustain resources, and energize others to honor, respect, and protect our country and our families first and foremost? 

     Or the team with no management experience, no proven abilities except to nurture its own charisma, and which has expended more energy criticizing our country than our enemies . . . the team that has admitted it believes in its hearts it can lead by raising taxes to increase a government that’s already nonproductive . . . the inexperienced team that’s convinced it can simply close it’s eyes and wish for the ship to sail itself?             halalpiar

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Yes, I remember it well.  

     Ah, yes. I remember it well.  Sitting unsteadily on a slightly tipsy, bolted-to-the-floor swivel stool in White Plains, New York, over forty years ago.  I was at the lunchroom counter of the long-since-departed St. Agnes Hospital, which stood ominously on a bluff overlooking General Foods corporate headquarters and the major connecting road between the Tappan Zee Bridge and New England Thruway.  I was on my sixth cup of coffee.

     I was keeping my mind busy, working a Times crossword puzzle, which I routinely completed in those days on the 50-minute train commute to my Madison Avenue advertising job.  The difference was that on this particular day, September 17th, my writing hand was having trouble receiving both the correct word puzzle entries and motor skill management directives at the same time.  I had put my pen through the little numbered boxes at least three different times (probably once for each two cups of coffee!).  The difference was that on this particular day, September 17th, I was not riding a train; I was in the process of becoming a father.

     I remember explaining my plight to the counter waitress, who had to turn away to stuff a dishtowel in her mouth to keep from laughing out loud.  I guess the half dozen coffees, cigars sticking out of my pocket, and lightning-struck look on my face gave me away. 

     Now that it was too late to do anything about the impending delerium of having a baby, I could only swallow hard and make pen-holes in my crossword . . . and pray, which I actually seriously considered until my brother arrived to pull up the stool next to me, and proceeded to glug some evil spirits from a pocket flask into my cup #6 and his cup #1.  It’s an old Irish-Armenian-American thing, he said.  I needed it, he said.  I took a sip.  Both stools seemed to get more shaky (not the one Lil Bro sat astride): the one I sat on, and the one inside me!

     After what felt like 3 1/2 years, the doctor appeared behind me.  I tried to stand, but could only manage to jitter and stutter . . . Wwwwwha sssgoin gone, Doc?  Congratulations, Dad!  It’s a girl!  Mother and baby are both fine and you can go see them now if you like!  Did someone hit me behind the knees with a sledgehammer?  Whew!  Hey, Lil Bro, hold me up here, will you?  Jeeze!  A girl!  A GIRL!!  I’m a father!  Gotta see ’em now.  NOW!  OH, what a happy day!!  Welcome to the world, Haley!

     And no one could have ever predicted what a genuinely spectacular human being Haley has turned out to be.  Besides being the perfect Mother to my three super grandchildren, she is truly “the apple of my eye” and I couldn’t be more proud than I am of her right now to also count her as my friend.  I love you, Bug.  Happy Birthday!  halalpiar         

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Hold Your Next Meeting

S T A N D I N G ! 

It’s your company or professional practice, division, department, team or work group . . . and meetings are eating up valuable time that needs to be used more productively.  Welcome to the majority, dear boss!  You are not alone in your frustration.  There ARE however some steps you can take to eliminate or minimize the impact of time-wasting get-togethers. 

Here are two first steps you may want to consider:

     First, accept the fact that it’s worth taking the risk of changing your approach to meetings!  What’s the worst that could happen?  Next, take a minute to write a summary sentence of what a typical meeting is like and what’s typically wrong. 

Then, think on the sentence you wrote as you consider the following questions:

• Do you use an agenda?  Is it circulated a day or two ahead of time so others can contribute topics under the (usually last, in case time runs out) new business section?  Is the agenda posted on newsprint or a posterboard or whiteboard or someplace where all can see it and keep track of topics and progress during the meeting? 
• Do agenda points have names or initials of those designated or responsible next to each?  Is the agenda a reasonable length given the alloted time?  Do you STICK to the agenda?  Do you step up to tell someone who’s strayed from the agenda that this meeting needs to stay on the agenda and that the point raised is a good one but needs to be dealt with separately after the meeting or with a separate session?
• Do you hold regular ongoing “status report” type meetings at regular set times at the beginning of every week or, in some cases when needed, at the beginning of every day?  Do you hold special monthly, quarterly, annual or semi-annual, or weekend retreat meetings?  Are these planned well in advance?
• Are ONLY those whose input is essential invited to your meetings?  Are people kept captive in your meetings for an hour or more when they need only be present for a five or ten-minute hunk of time, and could more easily be scheduled in a specific times on the agenda?  Do you remember to ALWAYS praise in public and criticize in private? 
• Do you solicit input from those attending or have them serve as an audience?
• Do you take notes and specifically request that all attendees take handwritten notes?  (Laptops are too distracting!)  Are follow-up issues given (and held to) deadlines or due dates?  Are expectations about follow-up actions clear to everyone involved?  You’re sure?
• Do you always start and end every meeting at exactly the times you advertise? 

     If you’ve been doing all or most of these things, and STILL have a meeting problem, remove the chairs from the meeting room, and conduct your next meeting STANDING!  Watch how fast things move and how little B.S. comes to the surface! 

     Finally, remember that:

 The more you manage by walking around, the less you’ll need to manage by sitting around!

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www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson]

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

All the world’s a stage.

                                                                           

(Maybe Shakespeare had it wrong?)

                                                                                                    

     He said all the world’s men and women are “merely actors.”  Are we?  Do we, for example, do what we do and say what we say purely for the intrinsic worth of it?  Or do we preoccupy our minds with intentions of impressing others for the lame sakes of our own egos?  Or are the shows we put on and the acts we deliver simply a means to our ends? 

     These are not unimportant questions in the grand scheme of things because the answers are ones that actually end up driving and energizing us as individuals as well as team players. 

     And youth (ah, yes, remember that?) seems rather tenacious in its approach to ego protection, projection, promotion, and strengthening vs. the signs of acceptance that seem to come to many with age.  Or is it that we just lose contact with (or not give a damn) after journeying over one of those proverbial “hills” that mark numerous birthdays from 29 on up that end in a zero?

     Maybe Shakespeare had it wrong?

     Maybe all the stages are our worlds!

     My “stages”—my office, my bedroom, my softball field, my car, my garage, my favorite restaurant, my favorite beach and mountain and vacation escape, my telephone, my computer— plus those I share with my wife, and friends, and relatives, and dogs, and guests, and business associates, and neighbors—all seem to dictate my behavior, my acting, and move me forward in ways unique to each set and setting. 

     Each stage offers different props and lighting and sound levels, and to each I often wear different costumes.  Each has different entrances and exits, and each affords large, small, sometimes indifferent and sometimes exuberant audiences.  Some stages promote my appearances ahead of time, some I sneak into and out of, some I enjoy and others, like the dentist’s chair stage . . . 

     Oh, well, sorry Will.  It was a good idea at the time, I thought: thinking of your words differently.  But, then, wasn’t that perhaps your intent after all?  Ah, onest wilst never know, wilst one?             halalpiar  

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     I HATE being a “blogger”!

     I’m a writer.  When I write something that gets published, people ask me to sign it.  When I rent a car in Ireland where writers –not football and Hollywood stars– are the national heroes, and I fill in “writer” for occupation, the counter clerks practically trip over their green shoelaces (yes, Irish green predates America’s “green“!) trying to grant my slightest wish. 

     Former schoolmates who generally thought it best that I should simply be swept under someone’s rug (because my Father was a low-life mailman who drank too much and I was a little too illiterate and rough around the edges), are now agog (agoogle?) at my sophisticated career track.

     So that enviable high-brow reputation thing was all working out, and then one day I decided to try blogging. Like I’ve done alot of things once: parasailing, taboggoning, i-podding, so I never dreamed that writing a blog would make me a blogger!  Imagine!  On Monday, I’m a writer with years worth of writing experience.  On Tuesday, I write a blog and on Wednesday, VOILA!  I’m a blogger!  

     I mean I once wrote the words for a matchbook cover, but I didn’t go and wake up the next morning as a matchbooker.  So what’s the deal with blogging?  The damn word isn’t even in my dictionary, which is only a couple of years old.  My grandmother would have a fit to hear that I ended up after a life of intellectual toil and hardtimes to be . . . ta ta ta DAH: . . . . . a   b  l  o  g  g  e  r  ! 

     Good Grief, Charlie Brown!  A BLOGGER?  Unfortunately, it sounds and looks a bit like BOOGER, which is not a terribly flattering analogy.  And it really doesn’t work well with kids either.  My grandchildren give me “Where, oh where has my little blogger gone?  Oh, where oh where can he be . . . ?” and “Hickory dickory dock.  The blogger ran up the clock!” [Did you ever stop and think about the violence there, by the way, of running after the three poor old (blind, no less) mice with a carving knife and cutting off their tails?  That’s like a bloody mess.  Whew!  And then there’s the breaking bough that comes down from the treetops with the baby?]  Who writes this stuff anyway?  A writer. 

     Maybe being a blogger ain’t so bad afterall.  I mean like a WRITER can’t run around saying “ain’t” and stuff like that, write?  Er, right?  Well, a blogger can. 

     Okay.  I’ll take it.  I’ll take “blogger.”  I don’t like it.  I’d much rather be just a plain old WRITER, but blogging IS what’s happening.  I hear people shout “Que Passe?” and other people shout back: “Blogging!”  

     Somehow, I just can’t imagine renting a car in Ireland and telling the desk person I’m a blogger, and having a big whoopdewhoop go on, but maybe quieter is better, you know?  At least if it’s quiet, I can write.         halalpiar    

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You must define

                                               

—in writing,

                                                                                            

in one sentence!

                                             

— the problem!  

     One thing that both kinds of writing –business and literary– have in common is the need to organize first and write second.  Since I do both kinds of writing for a living, I have found a simple, low-tech system for getting organized that will minimize hi-tech, multiple-screen, cut ‘n paste operations later.

     The Green Way:

1) Get a paper-cutter.

2) Save all one-sided printouts that you would ordinarily disgard, and pile them with printed sides all facing one way.

3) Cut the sheets of paper (a few dozen) into quarters.

     The Non-Green Way:

     Buy a deck of 3×5 or 5×8 index cards (multi–color are often useful).

     Start scribbling one-word or one-sentence ideas onto individual pieces of your quartered papers (or cards) as each thought occurs to you (sometimes, with hours in between). 

     Let’s say you’re going to write a business plan for a new venture (and, for brevity’s sake, using index cards).  One card might say “Narrative Section” and another, “Financial Projections.”  Then you add separate cards to the pile: “The Competition” and “The Management Team” and “The Mission Statement” and “Objectives” and “Strategies” and “Tactics.”  But then you think that there should be “CREATIVE Objectives, Strategies and Tactics” as well as “FINANCIAL Objectives, Strategies and Tactics” and you think of defining “Objectives” with the four criteria (Specific, Realistic, Flexible, and Due-Dated) in order to keep your Objectives out of fantasyland.  [Ahem; politicians please take note!]

     But before you even establish an objective, you must define –in writing, in one sentence!– the problem (or need) that your OST’s propose to address.

     So, now you also have cards that say “Define The Problem” and “Specific” and “Realistic” and “Flexible” and “Due-Dated.”

     Whatever you end up with (and that may mean a hundred cards or more!), spread them (the cards) out on a very large tabletop . . . or even better, the floor, so you can march around them pretending to be thinking harder, which will definitely impress those who wander into your room or office!

     Then start to move them (the cards) around, consolidate them, add new ones, organize them into an outline format.  Then, tape them all together-as-a-wall-hanging-style outline and hang the whole mess on the wall.  Or copy the whole enchilada onto one piece of paper and go from there.

     The same dynamics apply to all you literary types for organizing chapters and dialogues, even pieces of poems.  The bottom line is that when you’ve captured everything in your head and put it on paper and organized it, it’s no longer running around in your head.  Aaaaah, more room to create!                                 halalpiar

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Sorry, Dear Agent, I’m Too

Swamped To Write This

To You Personally . . .

     Well now, if you’re a serious writer, you know what I’m talking about here. 

But, if you’re a literary agent, you probably don’t because:

A) If you communicate clearly and honestly and with some sense of cultivating a positive reputation –if not a relationship– then you already communicate clearly and honestly with some sense of cultivating a positive reputation, if not a relationship, OR

B) If you are and you don’t (a literary agent who doesn’t communicate . . .), which unfortunately seems to me to constitute the vast majority, maybe no one has put it in your face that Communication Deficit Disorder (CDD) is an affliction common to –and rampaging through– your profession.

     It’s one thing, for instance (and extraordinarily rare I might add), for a writer to receive a pleasant, thoughtful rejection notice from an agent you’ve queried or submitted material requested for review, and quite another still (the “rule” it appears to me and scores of other writers I’ve asked) to get back a snotty, arrogant, auto-formatted reply that’s about as personal as used cardboard . . . or the other extreme: one that’s over-the-top patronizing.

     It’s especially demeaning to get the same nonsense wording returned in response to three separate submissions over a long time period –each noting that the agent has been “too swamped lately with work to give proper attention” to a submission.  Actually, the guy I’m referring to has been “too swamped” for four years.  Somebody should send him a towel and dry clothes!

     Did all literary agents take the same “How To Reject and Dismiss Writer Submissions” course?  Did all of them hire the same lifecoach to give them all the same sets of words to use?  I have read over and over how literary agent “decisions are very subjective ones, and what doesn’t work for one may work for another.”  How helpful and empathetic.  Then there’s “It might be useful to review agent listings in the Guide to Literary Agents or . . .”  Duh!  No kidding?  How does this genius think I found her or him to start with?

     Oh, and ten agents have found my work “intriguing” but all ten were “afraid it’s not interesting enough for me, and good luck . . .”  Thanks all!  I’m simply thrilled to know you’re intrigued but not interested.  I never realized it was possible to be both of those things at the same time.  Aaaah, what we can learn when we subject ourselves to experts!

     Well, probably all the wrong folks are reading this.  Serious writers are probably still with me, and odds are most of them are in agreement about at least parts of what I’ve said.  Agents though who need to read this and have their cages rattled, have no doubt disconnected back up front at the first suggestion that they might be subjected to the same subjectivity they dispense.

     Oh, well.  I got it off my chest.  Now it’s time to move on . . . have you been following my 7-words-or-less-sentence story?                         halalpiar 

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‘Going Green’

                                           

has only one meaning

                                                                               

that has meaning. 

                                                                                                      

      You can talk “going green” for your business until St. Patrick’s Day shamrocks come out, but reality is that “going green” has only one meaning that has meaning:

BREAKING THE CYCLE OF INVASIVE TOXINS

THAT COME FROM PRODUCT MANUFACTURING

PROCESSES, PRODUCT USE AND PRODUCT DISPOSAL.

     There is really only one way to accomplish this cycle-breaking, to phase out and eliminate product ingredients like Chlorine and Bromine and Lead and Mercury and PBDE and PVC and Melamine and all the rest:

     CHECK THE INGREDIENTS OF PRODUCTS YOU PURCHASE —INCLUDING THOSE YOU MIGHT LEAST LIKELY SUSPECT (LIKE MATTRESSES, BABY CAR SEATS, PAINT, SHOWER CURTAINS, FURNITURE, CARPETING, ROOM DEODORIZERS, ETC.)– AND SPECIFY NON-TOXIC INGREDIENTS FOR PRODUCTS THAT YOU PURCHASE FOR OTHERS. 

     MAKE SURE THE GOODS AND SERVICES (LIKE CLEANING) THAT YOU PURCHASE SPECIFICALLY DO NOT INCLUDE POISON TOXINS IN THE MANUFACTURING PROCESS AND THAT THE PRODUCTS DO NOT RELEASE POISON TOXINS INTO THE AIR AND LANDFILLS WHEN THEY ARE USED OR WHEN THEY ARE INCINERATED OR DISGARDED.  

     Don’t know what all these toxic chemicals are?  Take a few minutes to pull them up on search engines and force yourself, if that’s what it takes, to learn which ones are the worst, which are most common, and what they do to you, and your pets, and the land, and our water and food supplies. 

     The few minutes you spend now to teach yourself can literally save your corner of the planet in the days, months and years ahead . . . for you and your grandchildren!                           halalpiar 

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