My brain is drained. 

My French is fried. 

Thank God this week coming is the last of the last!

     I am SO sick of politics.  I really don’t care anymore about who did what to whom under what circumstances however many years ago.  I resent the 24/7 bombardment of my senses . . . radio, TV, lapel pins, newspapers, bumper stickers, Internet, emails, road signs, telephone calls, even dog bandannas!  AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaakkkKKKKKKK!!

     Enough already!  My brain is drained.  My French is fried.  And into the home stretch, the lies get bigger and the assaults more ruthless. 

     Worst of all, there doesn’t appear to be any let-up until Wednesday morning.  Oh, yeah, we have another three whole days ahead of yelling and screaming and senseless accusations, charges and counter-charges. 

     Why does everything in America have to reduce itself in the Eleventh Hour to a ridiculous free-for-all mixed-martial-arts contest with everyone beating each other to a pulp? 

     What does it accomplish? 

     Who among those of us dumb and dumbers have not yet made up our minds about who to vote for, that some last minute fringe lunatic tidal wave of pronouncements is about to sway? 

     Tell me.  I’m really wondering about this.  How many votes do you think will jump on some bandwagon at the last minute because of some astronomically important statement being made that we’ve never heard before?  How many?  Tell me.

     Here’s what we need, people!  We need a three-day moritorium where no candidate says anything to anybody and no media reports of any candidate or issue are allowed.  We need a three-day retreat of peace and quiet to collect ourselves and our thoughts and allow ourselves to heal and become sane again . . . BEFORE we vote!

     Given the opportunity to stimulate our neurological systems with increased oxygen flow and relax our muscles with increased blood flow by taking lots of deep breaths and long stretches, and by temporarily withdrawing from the franticness and fanaticism of the outside world, WE WILL CAST A BETTER BALLOT!

     Oh, yes, and wouldn’t this fit right in with the lunatic taxation spread-the-wealth fringe element in society that’s focused on all things green and peace-symboled and artsy-craftsy and tree-hugging?  Even those folks would welcome a three-day peace period!  Besides, it might give them cause to reassess the candidates they’ve sold out their faith to.

     So, let’s see . . . how do we do something like this?  We get our elected representatives to introduce legislation.  Right.  I knew something this valuable to us, as human beings, wouldn’t be so simple.  It requires a campaign.  Something like a 24/7 bombardment of radio, TV, lapel pins, newspapers, bumper stickers, Internet, emails, road signs, telephone calls, even dog bandannas!     Halalpiar    

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Check out this

Miss-Goody-Two-Shoes list . . . 

     Staying close to family and friends, keeping your mind active, laughing, exercising, maintaining a spiritual connection, eating right, staying abreast of current events, using a cell phone and the Internet, even online dating!

     Now what on Earth do you imagine these activities represent?

     You’d better take a deep breath and get ready for this one.  The list above that starts with staying close and ends with online dating are the results of a recent poll of 100 healthy 100 year-olds (centenarians) who offered these positive lifestyle choices as the secrets to living long lives.  Thanks for this study update to Dr. Andrew Weil as reported in his November, 2008, Self Healing newsletter www.drweilselfhealing.com

     As for a couple of specifics, according to Dr. Weil’s newsletter account, 90 of the 100 polled considered “staying close to family and friends” as “very important.”  Over half attributed “staying abreast of current events” to healthy aging.  Also, older doesn’t necessarily mean sicker; high levels of disability are not given characteristics of triple digit aging.

     So, LAUGH!  DO PUZZLES!  WALK!  PRAY!  EAT BETTER!  PAY ATTENTION TO THE NEWS (EVEN KNOWING HOW WARPED ITS PRESENTERS ARE!)  GET ON THAT COMPUTER AND CELL PHONE!  And for heaven’s sake, start online dating and go to those family gatherings you hate!

     There you are, a prescription for getting to old age . . . assuming you really want to.  On the other hand, what harm could it do to give this stuff a try?  Unless, that is, you decide to be doing three or more of these life extension activities at the same time.  Like, it may not be in your best interests to be making cell phone calls to your online dating partner at your family’s Thanksgiving Day dinner gathering. 

     On the other hand, maybe some shenanigans would be in order for Halloween ;<)Halalpiar         

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“Change the way you

look at things,

and the things you

look at change.” 

—Dr. Wayne Dyer, from The Power of Intention  

     We’ve talked here about “change” not being a leadership word because true leaders recognize that change only has value when those being affected by it can choose it for themselves.  True corporate leaders.  True healthcare leaders.  True family leaders.  True government leaders.

     True leaders know that they cannot impose change, they can only inspire and motivate those who will benefit by change to step up to the plate and make it happen.  We’ve already addressed the incompetence of those in America who proclaim themselves leaders and who naively and unrealistically think they can simply dictate change. 

     Like the iron-hand rulers of Cuba, and Iran, and Russia, like Marxists and Communists.  Forget it!  These power-crazed Americans with agendas of change haven’t a clue about free democracy.  They can look and sound like the empty Hollywood celebrities, but they lack the understanding, skill and experience to be effective leaders.  They haven’t been there.  They haven’t done it. 

     Thomas Jefferson said “Vigilence is the price of freedom.”

     Those who espouse imposing “change” as a political platform fly in the face of the stability of our nation’s vigilence that is the very fiber of freedom. 

     Change, as Dr Dyer’s quote above reminds us, is really a matter of attitude more than action, perception more than taxation, intention more than condemnation.  It is winning by teamwork, which is what great leadership inspires. 

     Great Olympic coaches talk “TEAM” as the acronym for “Together Everyone Achieves More.”  Every period of great achievement in American history has been orchestrated not by imposed change, but by leaders who inspired success through teamwork.     Halalpiar         

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 TARGET YOUR SPIEL

WITH A DEAL!

     Clients are always asking me about email marketing, and the best ways to approach the copywriting.  Of course, I always tell them to just pay me an extra fee and I’ll take care of it, but with so many do-it-yourselfers around these days, I’ll share the following in the interests of upscaling the quality of the sales email industry. 

     See, and you thought I wasn’t a nice guy!  So, here it is for free: a million dollars worth of commercial writing consulting (assuming it helps you sell a few million what-ever-you-gots!) 

     No matter what your email marketing needs may be, and regardless of what you’re selling, your creative output needs to attack three basic issues that are prompted by three simple questions:

1. What’s the list (your target)?
2. What’s the story (your spiel)?
3. What’s the offer (your deal)?

     In other words, your email must zero in on the right audience with your best answer to the only question each prospect has that really matters: “What’s in it for me?”  Nothing else you say will matter.  You can provide nice little lists of your product or service features, but only benefits will trigger the emotions that will create a sale.

     Now that you know what needs to happen.  So, get ready for the second part of the one-two punch.  Here are three more food-for-thought requirements that need to cornerstone the creative development of the recommended 500-or-fewer-words:

1. The writing must be clear and concise.
2. The writing must feel like someone is talking, not writing. 
3. The writing must ask for the sale early and often, and give prospects as many different ways as possible to buy the product or service.

     Now, these points may sound very authoritative but they are guidelines, not rules.  The 500-or-fewer-words thing, for example, is what many authorities indicate is essential to avoid boring or overkilling your prospect.  Yet some emails of 3000 words or more have been and can be very effective, depending on the circumstances of the list, the story (the nature of the product or service) and the actual offer!          

Halalpiar

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P.S.  SPECIAL THANKS to my writers group members Jean Ryan, Harry Banks, and Viviane Philmon for help with my brand new revised bookjacket synopsis! (Click on Literary Agents tab above) 

Too much use of color.  

                                                      

Too much use of color. You can’t be all things to all people. The type sizes are too big. The type sizes are too small.  The blue color on the right is too light. Your manuscript synopsis is too wordy. Delete half the paragraph. The sentences are too long. 

Okay, okay. You’re right! Thank you!

(And stop using exclamation points!) 

Yes, indeedy.

I wrote about being a REwriter the other day, and tonight I was reminded by my wonderful, talented, loving writers critique group that everything I said then is still true a couple of days later.  Does that qualify for a longevity label?  It certainly qualifies for reinforcement of the truth. 

Everything every writer writes is going to end up rewritten if the writer is indeed serious about the process and the intent of her or his writing.  It’s not like you hammer a nail that’s a little crooked, but that serves the purpose of holding pieces together, that you can just overlook the bend without prying it out, and go on to the next nail because nobody will notice it anyhow.  Unfortunately, it’s not that easy.  When you write something, SOMEbody notices EVERYthing.

So instead of a too long, too colorful, too wordy, too exclamation-pointed blog post tonight, I am going to work on my long-overdue-for-REwrite-attention synopsis.  Hey, maybe it will get done by tomorrow, and we can return to my regular blog postings, the ones filled with uproarously provocative commentary.  You remember them?   

Tune in tomorrow.  Same time.  Same channel.  New synopsis.                halalpiar 

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BULLETIN!  NEWS FLASH!

From the wire services . . . The communications industry has been rocked by the surprise announcement today of a new microchip that developers claim will allow the sending and receiving of text messages simply by thinking of the person with whom a user will want to communicate. 

The bead-sized chip, called “BeeDee” short for BrainDrain(c) was developed after three years of research on chickens. 

BeeDee(c) is embedded in the skull with a simple, minimally-invasive procedure that any family physician will be able to do during an in-office visit.  No anesthesia is necessary. 

The announcement came early this morning from two teenage tech game developers who embarked on the research project as a response to their chronically sore thumbs.  

     Weird news, huh? 

     True?  Naw, at least not yet.  I suppose we couldbe close to something so bizzare actually happening.  Well, okay, maybe not “chickens,” but mice are kind of overused these days.

     What’s the point? 

     In business, as in life, it seems that those who succeed most often are those who expect the unexpected.  Now I’m not advocating endless planning and worrying about what hasn’t yet come (and may never).  I’m simply saying something I’ve said in other ways on different days, that the healthiest physical, mental, and emotional place to be is the same place every good Boy Scout would recommend: PREPARED.  You know that place? 

     No, don’t start getting out your boots, umbrella, parachute and belt-holstered knife.  Not that kind of “prepared” (unless, of course, these kinds of items fit your lifestyle or situation). 

     I’m talking about regular stretching and exercising plus eating and sleeping right to be physically prepared for whatever comes along.  I’m talking about quickly considering “what’s the worst that could happen?” before taking any non-routine action so that at least you’ve thought it out and can respond promptly if necessary. 

     I’m talking about always keeping an open mind when dealing with others and try forcing yourself to listen 80% of the time and talk only 20% of the time. 

     Whoa!  Are you kidding?  Nope.  Try it three times this week and watch what happens!

When you sleep on

                                          

your ideas . . . “ 

     “And you, Sir, what do you do for a living?”

     “I’m a rewriter.”

     “A, ah, REwriter, Sir?  Um, a REwriter.  Is that what I understood you to say?  I don’t believe I’ve ever heard of that career.  Do you write about RE’s, as in DO-RE-ME?  Or does this mean you write subject lines for memos where it says RE:?  Ha, Ha, Ha!”

     “Aaaah, yes, that’s very funny!  You must be the same guy who comes up with Letterman’s ‘Top 10’ lists.  No.  Sorry to disappoint you, it’s just that I am tired of lying all these years when people ask me that question, and I answer, writer!  Why?  Because the truth is that I—like every other writer—am a REwriter and that NO writer on Earth is a writer!  All of us are REwriters!“

     How do I know?  Show me one single writer who has ever written anything that she or he has not spent untold hours REwriting!  Go ahead!  Mention just one in the comment box below. 

      I have completed hundreds of articles; a few books; 125 blog posts; over 800 feature radio show scripts, numerous short stories and poems; thousands of ads. websites, news releases, commercials, speeches, business plans, college course curricula, billboards, and matchbook covers. 

     I’ll bet that I’ve spent at least 3-30 hours of REwriting for every 1 hour of writing! 

     Shakespeare REwrote.  Today’s most successful writers: Cormac McCarthy, John Grisholm, J.K. Rawling, David Baldacci, Kent Haruf, E. Annie Proulx, Richard Russo, Dean Koontz, Stephen Cannell, as just a short list of fiction-writer examples, REwrite every page of what we read in final published form as much as 20-30 times PER PAGE! 

     Why?  Because when you “sleep on” your ideas and then return to them a day (or week or month, sometimes years) later, you have lived and experienced so many more hours of life, that you have acquired a more perceptive perspective and improved skill for communicating more clearly than you had when you first rattled out your story or reporting ideas into manuscript format. 

     It’s refinement.  It’s enhancement.  It’s coming up with better word choices.  It’s figuring out better ways to paint verbal pictures.  It’s tweaking.  It’s the key ingredient in the creative process regardless of whether you’re a writer, and artist, a musician, an actor, a photographer, or a craftsperson. 

     It’s taking what you’ve started with and making it better. 

     So, RE-painting, RE-composing and RE-arranging, RE-hearsing, RE-shooting, and RE-crafting are all legitimate avenues that lead to standout performances and exceptional  accomplishments?  ABSOLUTELY! 

     In fact, RE is the ONLY avenue!      halalpiar

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Just go to the basement

                                       

and make more money!

                                                                      

miracle  an extraordinary and welcome event that cannot be explained by natural or scientific laws and attributed to a divine agency  

     There was a truly outstanding Broadway musical from the late 1950’s called Flower Drum Song.  A featured tom-tom drum-punctuated performance from the show was an upbeat song titled, “A Hundred Million Miracles.”

     Now some might grumble, yeah, that’s what we need now to straighten out this stinking economy.  Others might wish the song title sentiments for their favorite political candidate. 

     Those who face troubling health problems pray for just one miracle, let alone 99,999,999 more.  A hundred million.  A hundred million?  That seems a touch on the greedy side, doesn’t it?  Like winning a mega-millions lottery. 

     Maybe it’s just me, but I’d be happy to accept just one million miracles . . . or dollars!  I mean what would you do with more than that anyway?  But then what do I know?  My high school and college baseball efforts never led me to major league status  compensation package excesses.

     I wonder if it’s possible there could be more willing beneficiaries floating around than there are hard-nosed workers willing to earn opportunities?  ;<) Just wondering! 

     I’ve heard all that “work smarter not harder” crap, and it sounds great, but I can’t help, but wonder if people who get the big bucks without really putting in much effort would much appreciate what’s handed to them.  So what, you say?  Yeah, well, I guess we can overthink things like this, right?  So just go ahead and send me the money.  I promise to appreciate it.

     As for miracles, I’d take a few of those too just because I’d have fun turning lives around, helping the down-trodden back to their feet, and eliminating hunger, disease, ignorance, and violence.  Only trouble is we’d end up with a bunch of fat, healthy, smart-ass, mamby-pambies with nothing else to do except screw up our economy . . . and that would be a miracle all by itself!  Accounts overdrawn?  So you just go to the basement and make more money.  Whoops, it all gets spent?  You just go to the basement and make more money.  Can’t make it fast enough?  Just start raising taxes. 

     That’s called spreading the wealth.  Not so bad, right?    halalpiar    

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DO I HAVE TO DO

EVERYTHING MYSELF?

     How many times have you made (or heard) this complaint?  One reason new businesses fail is that the entrepreneurial founders feel like they have to do everything themselves, or else . . .

     Or else WHAT? 

     Or else it won’t get done right?  What is “right”?  Who says what is “right” and what is “wrong”?   

     Don’t you really mean to say that “No one else will do this task the way I would do it”?  Well, Sherlock, that’s probably close to 100% true in every instance! 

     It’s not likely ANYone will ever do ANYthing exactly the way you would because no one else could possibly be as motivated as you because it’s not her or his business.  It’s YOUR business. 

     So what’s the next best way to deal with things?  If you’re lucky and have been careful in recruiting and hiring, you should be reasonably able to expect that someone else really should be able to do whatever task that’s asked of him or her, and be able to get it done in a manner that you should be able to live with (assuming that the end result is the same as it would have been had you done things your way). 

     But, you know what?  If you can’t tolerate someone else’s method (assuming the other person’s time and expenses are not totally out of whack), you need to either get on with doing the task yourself and not bitching about it, and realizing you’ve stumbled onto a roadblock to your business’s growth . . . or turn your business over to someone else and go get another life. 

     Delegating is not easy when you’re used to doing everything yourself, but your business can’t grow if you can’t get others to get the job done. 

     Delegation requires encouragement, training and back-up support, and incentives.  Small frequent rewards work wonders.  So does a physical pat on the back for a job well done (regardless of whether it was accomplished in exactly the same way you would have done it or not), a handwritten note, recognition in a news release or on a plaque or certificate, or a special bonus or reward that fits that person’s needs. 

     Only you can decide what motivates best and you can only do that by getting to know what makes each individual tick!  That means you need to get to know those who work for and around you well enough to help them achieve what’s important to them!       halalpiar

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“Like driving in

the middle of the ocean!”

     What a great place to live – DELMARVA Peninsula.  Unless you count the whole State of Florida as a peninsula, DELMARVA is the biggest peninsula in the U.S., and one of the largest in the world! 

     I just found out a couple of years back that the name DELMARVA is because three states share the one peninsulated space . . . hence, the name: DEL for Delaware; MAR for Maryland; VA for Virginia. 

• It’s easily a five-hour drive from the Delaware Memorial Bridge between New Jersey and Wilmington, Delaware, to the Peninsula’s southernmost tip in Cape Charles, Virginia. 
• The Cape May-Lewes Ferry from New Jersey’s southernmost tip to Cape Henlopen (rapidly pronounced K-Pen-Low-Pen), Delaware, home of Lewes (pronounced Lewis), Delaware, the “First Town” in the “First State” in the United States takes 70-90 minutes to cross Delaware Bay at the mouth of the Atlantic. 
• The Bay Bridge across Chesapeake Bay to and from Annapolis?  Well, that sometimes hair-raising ride can be (almost literally) a breeze, or take close to forever.  

     Delmarva history swirls around Nanticoke and Lenape and “Delaware” Indians, rich and abundant farmland and produce —especially corn, soy, wheat, chickens— and of course, crabs. 

     Recent years will find much ado about the nearly one-mile distance that manmade non-motorized catapults hurl pumpkins in the Annual World Championship Punkin Chu-nkin Contest! 

     And there’s much to explore, from worldclass arts and handcraft shows, golf courses, major horse and car racing events, to minor league baseball and national championship softball, fishing, swimming, boating, boardwalks, and wild pony herds in ocean dunes . . . plus, it seems, every religious affiliation opportunity imaginable.   

     When someone refers to “the Eastern Shore” you need to know where that person is standing.  The Eastern Shore in Delaware is the Atlantic Coast line from Lewes, Delaware south to Fenwick Island.  (And some, I’m told, consider the Delaware Bay coast from Lewes, north to Wilmington The Eastern Shore!) 

     The Eastern Shore in the southern Virginia tip of Delmarva is the Atlantic Coast line from Chincoteague south to the southernmost tip of Cape Charles at the foot of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel.  If you’re in mainland Maryland or Virginia, The Eastern Shore is the stretch of Chesapeake Bay coastline and islands galore from Wilmington south to Cape Charles.

     Enough!  It’s a great place with great people.  Visit sometime!  It’ll make you happy!       halalpiar   

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