“Pretty good job… for a woman!“

“Thanks for nothing” types of “mixed” messages pervade today’s society– in meetings, phone calls, emails, texting, even music! “Don’t smoke, don’t drink, and don’t curse,” he warns his new employee. Then the boss frantically pats down his pockets and exclaims with frustration: “Sh*t! I must have left my pipe at the bar!”

“All the world’s a stage…” proclaimed Shakespeare. At one time or another, we all play roles and mask ourselves in some way. If we become aware of ourselves when we are putting on a performance, that awareness gives us the freedom to reject unproductive (unless you’re “on stage”) playacting in favor of authenticity.

And (yes, apples are great, but) certainly, A is for AUTHENTICITY too! It is Authenticity, after all, that is the overriding human quality which serves us best in both life and work

. . . yet, short of hiring someone to monitor or videotape our daily words and actions, it can be difficult at best to be aware of when we are “putting on airs” or undermining someone else or sabotaging current circumstances. Why? Because playacting is often an unconscious knee- jerk reaction to another person or situation.

So what are we to do to begin eliminating or at least minimizing phoney images and communications?

Awareness of life/career damages from disingenuous behavior is the beginning. So, you’ve already started. Next comes making a conscious effort to strengthen your resistance to assume or take on these self-destruct roles. You need to “catch yourself” by keeping your mind and body in better balance with the real you:  the deep-inside you.

Accept from the outset that–unless you’re another Mother Theresa–you may be unlikely to ever achieve 100% authenticity. But know that even slight improvements will enhance your personal respectability and community standing, and will dramatically increase others’ acceptance of your ideas and trust.

Once you are aware of this thinking and accept that “being more genuine” will rocket-boost your life, work, and play pursuits, begin to take more deep breaths. That alone will help you ground yourself in times of trouble and, ultimately, clarify your here-and-now focus in ways that win you more intrinsic happiness and more extrinsic rewards.

Being more aware paves your path to greater control and spotlights that everything you say and do is a choice that you make or the result of some choice you have made at some point in life. Simply by being more “Choice-Conscious,” you will find yourself better able to illuminate your strengths and free up your uniqueness . . . bring your real self, your authenticity, to the surface in more of what you think and say and do.

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Hal@Businessworks.US          931.854.0474

Open  Minds  Open  Doors

Many thanks for your visit and God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

What I’ve Learned About

FEARLESS Selling!

Speak up for what you want. If you don’t spell it out, no one will ever know where you want to go. Solicit feedback.

When you state a feeling, opinion or belief, SAY that it’s your feeling, opinion, or belief…instead of implying that you’re stating “facts.” Imagine standing in your listener’s shoes.

STOP saying “all” and “every” and “ever” and “never” because you’ll start to believe yourself…and others will start to doubt you..

When others tell you your idea won’t work, don’t believe them. Instead, give it a goal and a strategy. It’s easier to move forward with a map.

STOP, LOOK, and LISTEN isn’t just for railroad crossings. Ask questions, observe and listen hard. But as Einstein said, “all we ever have is limited knowledge”…so when it’s time to move on, go with what you know!

Turn off the news. Bombardments of negative, tragic events will invade, disrupt, corrode and corrupt positive attitudes. INSTEAD: Sing. Dance. Read. Laugh. Play. Walk. Take pictures.

Positive attitudes are preserved when you respond instead of react. If you don’t react, you can’t over-react. Learn to blame less and forgive more.

Stop worrying about how you look and pay attention to how you behave. Entrepreneurial leaders instill confidence and inspire action no matter what they wear. Contrary to popular myth: Clothes do not “make the man.”

Look everyone and every thing in the eye. Good contact, not staring. Looking at your feet or over someone’s shoulder broadcasts ambivalence and fear…feelings that fail to: sell, instill confidence, inspire trust, communicate authenticity, show interest.

When the competition gets tough, get tougher by being better informed, by delighting (not just “servicing”) your customers, and by being honest.

Keep your eyes and ears alert, and your mind open. Take more deep breaths to keep your SELF in the “here-and-now” as much as possible . . . because success is the journey, and expectations breed disappointment.

Remember your family, your friends and how to laugh. Above all: Trust your SELF!

Live. Love. Make it easy.

 Some concepts inspired by www.FEARLESStheMusical.com

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Hal@Businessworks.US          931.854.0474

Open  Minds  Open  Doors

Many thanks for your visit and Make today a GREAT day for someone!

You’re 40-something and trapped!

You’re 40-something and you’re sandwiched in between aging parents and young children. trying to build a career. Even the weekends are starting to suck. The family dog (or cat) is beginning to be your BFF.

What’s next? STEP BACK, that’s what! Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing (except driving, holding a baby, operating heavy equipment, or standing with your back to a cliff or stairway), take one physical step back away from the gum-biting clamor, pinch yourself in the butt and take three deep breaths. Just three, but don’t fake it. Three. Deep. Now. Before reading more. Go ahead. I’ll wait.

Now pay attention to this: No job is worth losing because your mind gets too busy racing in and out of your neighbors’, relatives’, co-workers’ issues and shortsightedness. They don’t understand your upsets. They never have. They’re not inside YOUR brain and you don’t need them to survive your circumstances. You need your SELF to make adjustments for your SELF — NOT to please others!

You need to “rattle your own cage” and that doesn’t mean a zoo or prison vacation. It means doing some honest soul-searching about who you really are, what you really want out of life, and how you think you’re going to get there.

Rule One: Take Charge of Your SELF! Only YOU know what YOU need to do. Listening to what others have to say is a good thing. Doing what others think you should do is not. So listen all you want, but ACT on your own behalf.

For every idea you have (after the three deep breaths!) about how you need to proceed with your “sandwiched” life, write it down: each idea at the top of its own page (yes, with a real pen or pencil on real paper . . . trust me you’ll get more authentic results than keyboarding it!). Put a minus- sign at the top left and a plus+ sign at the top right, with a vertical line top to bottom down the middle of the page.

Then identify the negative and positive points related to each idea in the appropriate column. Step back again. Yes, and three more deep ones. Then analyze your ideas based on comparing the two columns and on what you honestly feel inside your gut about each point, and each idea.

Maybe you’ve been being too patient and are filled with anxiety? Maybe you’ve not been patient enough and are filled with annoyance or are simply adding fuel to the fire? Where’s the right balance?

What are you doing right this minute to achieve the right balance? You think this is an easy exercise? It’s not if you’re doing it honestly. But is it worth it? Of course it is. YOU’re worth it, aren’t you? Then work at it.

Here’s a Broadway-bound musical: www.FearlessTheMusical.com filled with love, anxiety, humor, annoyance, and resolution to inspire. It’s all about finding balance — Try some of the “song previews” and remember: You’re never alone when you seek balance. Sing. Dance. Hum. Breathe. Think. And along the way, enjoy–and TRUST your SELF! Be FEARLESS! You’ll get through it. You can do it!

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Hal@Businessworks.US   931.854.0474

Open  Minds  Open  Doors

Many thanks for your visit and God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!