CRM=?

CRM=Customer Relationship Management, on the one hand, and CRM=Customer Retention Management, on the other.  Which is it?  Why does it matter?  Who cares?  Aren’t they both the same anyway?

Whoa!  First of all, there’s a remarkably big difference.  I heard a major sales muckity-muck from a humongous corporate entity–who really should know better–give a presentation today to one of my clients, and he tossed out the terms interchangeably before finally parking himself in the retention garage.

A careless miscue methinks.  Something about that ambivalence represented his whole attitude, which was essentially to laugh and smile his way through misleading and oh-one-more-thing half-truth price quotes that seemed to change with each clock tick closer to New Year’s.

Managing relationships with customers and attracting new ones by virtue of positive-oriented, proactive processes that involve some give and take, some sharing, the development of “high trust,” and mutual respect based on consistent demonstrations of integrity is where best-practice, leadership companies continue to move.

On the flip side, managing to retain or keep customers is a negative-oriented, knee-jerk reactive, desperation-based process that amounts to clinging-on-to-customer behaviors and seeking to appease at all costs . . . even giving away the store (or farm, or horse, or youngest son or whatever)because customer RETENTION programs are driven by insecurities and fears.

Ah, yes, well there is that little economic suffocation pit we’re thinking we need to be crawling out of.  Bull!  If you think that, you show that, and you won’t sell stilts to pygmies.  Get off your knees and out of the hole and stand up tall and sell value and sell your confident self!  Focus on the relationship!

And customers, by the way, get this.  It’s easy to spot people selling their wares from a position of perceived weakness, compared to those who register in the strong zone as they present themselves.

Think about it.  Would you rather have someone level with you and work to cultivate a relationship with you, or speak to you with crooked mouth and work to retain you?  There’s a much bigger difference in the RE words (RElationship and REtention) than most probably stop to think about.

The differences though account for the both the personality and the character of a given company.  Because the difference is a matter of attitude.

Attitude, we might want to remind ourselves is what accounts for the difference between success and failure, on the athletic field, on the stage, on the factory floor, in the farmland, the office cubicle, the great outdoors (to make sure we cover all you forest rangers, lumberjacks, truck drivers, lifeguards and ski patrol people out there), the boardroom, or the computer workstation.

It’s all about attitude.  All. 

What’s YOUR business ALL about?                  

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 931.854.0474    Hal@BusinessWorks.US

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!”  [Thomas Jefferson]

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

THE RUSH TO TRUST!

     Staying with the “Low Trust” issue raised in yesterday’s post, have you noticed recent responses to this red flag? 

     I have.  There’s a sudden proliferation of “Trust Us!” and “Trust This!” marketing messages (even from the usually unsavvy Better Business Bureau with its “Start With Trust” branding theme) being used –wishfully, hopefully– to ring out the old and ring in the new.

     That’s great, businesspeople . . . the wishing and hoping . . . but without some substance to back up the slogans, you’re just digging the hole deeper.  Why?  The public is tired of lip-service.  Can you blame them? 

     Customers and consumers alike (note ther’re not always the same!) are looking for businesses to do business with that give solid performances, and that maintain solid track-records for having consistently EARNED trust and confidence. 

     Buyers have learned the hard way to be more selective.  Enough with all the politics and empty political promises!  The public is fed up with companies that claim to be “green” at their front doors while dumping ill-treated wastewater out their back doors into neighboring rivers and streams, then pass along increases to customers for the cost of upgrading waste treatment. 

     The public is sick of (and from) wake-up-in-the-morning coughs delivered to respiratory systems by subdued-in-appearance power plants that placate daytime observers by claiming to be technologically advanced as they spew toxic fumes into the night skies. 

     And these are of course the same entities that wage relentless battles with alternative energy proposals that will force them to clean up their acts.  You know who they are.  They’re also the ones who never hesitate to pass any expense increases they’re forced to comply with along to their customers.

     Talking about being trustworthy and earning trust are two different things.  One’s an inexperienced schmoozer; the other co-pilots your jet!  Customers want to deal with businesses that walk the walk!

     Trust and ethics go hand-in-hand, but ethics go beyond behavioral benchmarks into life and attitude value systems. 

     I work with a solid client company in a shaky industry.  In what is generally considered a fast-paced, fly-by-night industry (we’ll stay with the airplane metaphor), where average career tenure is generally measured in months, my client has employees who’ve celebrated 20 and 30-year anniversaries by keeping in step and up to speed, and earning public trust along the way. 

     How do career tenures like these translate to the public-at-large? 

     Stability.  Reliability,  Honesty.  (Ah, there it is.  Businesses that cultivate long-term employee relationships are regarded by most of us as “high trust.”) 

     But, wait!  There’s more.  These veteran employees have also built a reputation for community involvement and charitable support.  They are the same businesspeople who spearhead local fundraising campaigns, who donate generously of their time and money to needy organizations in the towns and cities that support their business interests. 

     Oh, so it’s a give and take scenerio?  No.  It’s a do-your-work-as-honestly-and-diligently-as-you-can-and-respect-the-community-you-do-your-work-in scenerio.  It breeds trust.  Trust breeds sales.  Sales breed profits.  Profits breed success.  Success breeds a strong enonomy.  It’s time.    halalpiar   

# # #

See Nov 29th post (below) for New Year’s contest prize and rules – Then GO FOR IT!  Emails to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com with “SOUNDS OF THE SEASON” in the subject line.          # # #

Check out and contribute to the daily growing 7-Word Story started 105 days ago (inside a coffin).  Click on the link to the right, or go to the “BOOKS” tab at the top of this page, then to the top headline link.

One of the 27 million

                                  

auto industry experts

                                         

quoted this week

                                                               

. . . strongly recommends that as “The Big 3” hustle to try reinventing  themselves (assuming they’ve not become too gargantuan and convoluted), that dealerships should stop sounding so desperate, and start reconnecting with customers at a grass-roots level. 

     Good advice.  In fact, this is good advice right now for any and all businesses. 

     A December 2008 Corporate Communicator white paper published by www.bonmotcomms.com addresses what Bon Mot Communications refers to as “the low trust problem” in business today. 

     “Low trust” says this eloquently crafted document is rooted in the rise of irresponsibility that’s inherent in the delirious growth of social media networks, fueled by public “scandals and betrayals” in the midst of a global financial crisis, then layered onto “unprecedented demand for transparency.”

     What this thinking suggests to me, for business owners and managers, entrepreneurs, and professional practice principals, is that the time to choose to rise to the top is now!

     Customer faith and loyalty flies directly out of the kinds of industry and business leadership that fosters ongoing positive performances, that engages and accommodates customer bases, and that caters to and supports customer communities in clear and meaningful ways. 

     An old business graduate school professor of mine called it “the proof of the pudding.” 

     Like the famous commercial and cinema requests “Where’s the beef?” and “Show me the money!” (except with much greater consequence), uncovering the proof of the pudding means digging a whole lot deeper than mission and vision statements, deeper than promises and PR sound-bites. 

     It means demonstrating –again and again– a total commitment to cultivating your grass roots by delighting every single customer (including those you dislike and those who act wronged when they’re not) with every single encounter, every single day. 

     Hey, nobody said business success was easy to achieve and maintain.  Nine of eleven businesses fail in the first five years, mostly for lack of management skills, which include the ability to exceed customer expectations.   

     If you’re thinking this means lessons can be learned from customer-dedicated “Mom and Pop” approaches to business, you’re right! 

     If the small local grocery store doesn’t consistently provide customers with a little something extra –as the classic Bob Farell customer service training film, “Give ‘Em The Pickle” suggests– the small local grocery store will be gobbled up by giant supermarkets with bigger selections and lower prices. 

     And big companies that don’t give a little something extra earn low trust! 

     This coming week is the perfect time to take inventory of the attitude your business projects to others, and decide what you can do to start building or re-building or shoring up your own consumer confidence index.  It is, after all, all about sales, and customers who trust you because of your deeds will deliver your sales!  halalpiar 

# # #

See Nov 29th post (below) for New Year’s contest prize and rules – Then GO FOR IT!  Emails to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com with “SOUNDS OF THE SEASON” in the subject line.          # # #

Check out and contribute to the daily growing 7-Word Story started 104 days ago (inside a coffin).  Click on the link to the right, or go to the “BOOKS” tab at the top of this page, then to the top headline link.

No, they’re not just born. 

     Yes, they’re also made. Yes, just a handful of them are a million times more likely to save our collective financial butts than all the Nation’s politicians put together. 

     Why?  Because only entrepreneurs understand how to make things happen and then make them happen. 

     Throughout history, it’s been entrepreneurs that have risen to the task of overcoming crushing defeat and corporate lethargy.

Entrepreneurs are catalysts.

They believe (and practice) that some action is better than no action, that “if it ain’t broke, fix it anyway!”

Entrepreneurs are willing to take REASONABLE risks, and then take them.

They believe that “he who hesitates is lost” but they also consider worst case scenarios before charging forward.

     In other words, entrepreneurs are the business movers and shakers of our society. Entrepreneurs are the ones –not the velvet-tongue, loud-mouth, know-nothing, do-nothing politicians and mainstream media opinionists– who will get this lumbering, bumbling, storm-struck ship, this USS Economy, righted again and moving in a productive direction.

     It will happen, this straightening of the crooked path, but it will only happen because the gates of humanity are thrown open to the innovative pursuits of the entrepreneurial spirit that throbs deep within our existence as the guiding light and stronghold of leadership in the free world.

     Sure, we can choose to moan and groan and mope and drag our sorry selves from coast to coast, and wallow in our misery –as certainly many terrorist nations would relish. 

     Or, you know what? We can just as easily choose to make an active and conscious choice to pull ourselves up by the proverbial bootstraps and help pave the way for the waves of entrepreneurial development that are destined to raise us to new heights. 

     How will this happen?

We who are blessed to be part of the American spirit will help it to happen by what we do with every day and the gift of life each of us carries from dawn to dusk and beyond.

What we DO with that, how we use it to grant others freedom from oppression and depression, each in our own unique ways, with our own unique pats on the back… is how it will happen! 

     We shall rise up as a band of supporters, igniters, lending and offering the incentives to make forward motion possible. The shoulders, our shoulders, that we put to the wheel, and march along side other shoulders moving in the same directions of enlightenment will make the difference.

     The investments we make of ourselves in ourselves, and in clearing the way for those who have the gift of making lemonade from lemons, will make the difference.

     Think about someone you know, or perhaps yourself, who glows with that “git ‘er done” energy and drive . . . reach out with belief and encouragement. Yes, it will work as surely as even the tides rise and fall, and the moon fills with light.      

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  Hal@Businessworks.US   302.933.0116

  Open Minds Open Doors 

 Thanks for your visit and may God Bless You.

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

The sky is falling!  

What is this,

Chicken Little?

     Enough of this doom and gloom crap, already. 

     The only ones out there who are doing their jobs successfully are the two-faced mainstream media alarmist exaggerators!  And they have become so effective at brainwashing public opinion that they’re making the rest of us look like fools! 

     U.S. business owners and managers everywhere are walking face down with slumped shoulders.  They’re tsk-tsk-tsking the same people they had been rah-rah-rahing to build their businesses just a few short months ago. 

     What is this, Chicken Little?  The sky is falling? 

The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Washington Post, Boston Globe, Baltimore Sun, Time, Newsweek, and majority of other U.S. propaganda news publications . . . plus ABC, CBS, NBC, TNT, CNN, MSNBC, PBS, and majority of other propaganda news broadcasters have been doing their damnedest to paint our lives bleak and hopeless. 

     They have made every manipulative, conceivable effort to create unrest and depression.  Why?  It’s in their best interests; it serves them well: 

1. They’ve made the public hungry to find out more about this economic monster that’s crushing in around us on all sides, which sells newspapers and grows broadcast audiences (which attracts advertisers and commands higher rates).

2. They’ve made us search desperately for light so they can rally us to overcome the odds and revel in the brightness they think they can lead us all to, from out of the dark shadows they’ve created and wrapped around us.  (This is also designed to build sales, increase rates, and attract advertisers.) 

3. It helps them justify their years of relentless attacks on a President they despise, and pave the way for their annointed savior next month.  Unfortunately, nothing in their optimism could be more pessimistic.  (And this bit of shortsightedness may actually cost them money!)

4. Nothing (nothing) could be further from reality than the strategic roads they ride, but reality doesn’t sell newspapers or build viewer and listener bases — that command higher rates and sell more advertising. 

     What these great mind-bending institutions have failed to realize, however, is that they can never take away our freedom of choice.  And what we need to realize –to rise above the din of narrow-minded defeatest thinking that mainstream media representatives would have us wallow in– is that we CAN think and behave as we choose. 

     We can choose to simply reject all the nonsense the media would have us associate with their “recession” drumbeats.  We need only to look inside ourselves as business owners and managers, as key pieces to the business and economy turnaround leadership puzzle. 

     Finding fault doesn’t find the path out! Cutting budgets doesn’t create sales! 

     We need only to exercise our own intestinal fortitude as a nation of entrepreneurs, as a nation of businesspeople driven to achieve.  We are believers to the core.  We are people who exercise universal charity, who reach out to help the downtrodden back up onto their feet.  We see problems as opportunities. 

     We business owners and managers inspire by doing.  We do not accept the negative values that the media or others try to put upon us.  As a nation, we strive to be winners.  By charging forward to scale the heights, and by reaching beyond where others think is possible, we brighten the lights that bring hope to this planet.  halalpiar         

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  Hal@Businessworks.US   302.933.0116

  Open Minds Open Doors 

   Thanks for your visit and God Bless You.

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

ONE thing about Christmas  

There is ONE thing about Christmas that thankfully always survives.  And that ONE thing always manages to rise above:

• the protests of close-minded “PC” worrywarts who cringe (and yes, panic) at the thought of anyone mentioning anything more specific than “Happy Holidays” for fear of insulting and upending the belief systems of non-Christians

• the life-threatening turmoil of struggling people and countries

• the out-of-touch, out-of-place over-the-top commercialization of a joyous and sacred religious celebration

• the self-inflicted emotional and physical stress that breeds in upsetting memories and unrealistic worries triggered by self-indulgences and self-inadequacies that accompany annual cultural periods of celebration of love and family

• the shakiest of world economies, national economies, state economies, county and town economies, company and organization economies, family and personal economies

That ONE thing I’m talking about is the ever-expanding collection of traditional Christmas Carols.  The traditional Christmas Carols that all of us have grown up with and sang and hummed (and memorized so many of) that thankfully find their way into our hearts year after year. 

The poorest of times, the saddest of times, the most disconcerting of times are all at once lifted in spirit each year by the music that the celebration of Christmas inspires. 

Well, not for everyone, you say?  Wrong!  For everyone, save those that lurk among and hide behind the evilest and blackest of terroristic souls. 

The impact in today’s world for many is that Christmas carols in all their splendor supercede even much of the sacredness they celebrate.  The music is respected and enjoyed in every corner of our world. 

Find me even one non-Christian who doesn’t know some of these tunes and refrains, and who fails to find reassurance in the messages of peace and love and joy that the marvelous songs convey.

Am I suggesting the music is so pure and the music is enough that we should take down the Santa Clauses, pull the light display plugs, and not exchange gifts?  Hmmmm.  Maybe not a bad idea.  After all, times are pretty tough. 

Let me snap you back to reality: If you are reading this, odds are at least a zillion to one that times are not so tough for you compared to those who are suffering pain and hunger right now.  

I AM suggesting that our traditional Christmas music can and does literally carry the holiday season, even for many less fortunate people.  The point is that it can and does. 

However the spirit moves you best

is the best way for you to move. 

But whatever you do for or about Christmas, let yourself SING OUT!  It’s as good for your soul and well-being as laughter is for your heart!   halalpiar

# # #

See Nov 29th post (below) for New Year’s contest prize and rules – Then GO FOR IT!  Emails to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com with “SOUNDS OF THE SEASON” in the subject line.  # # #

Check out and contribute to the daily growing 7-Word Story started 91 days ago (inside a coffin).  Click on the link to the right, or go to the “BOOKS” tab at the top of this page, then to the top headline link.

And the time to turn on

                                               

that front burner is now. 

     Necessity, you’ve no doubt heard, is the mother of invention.  And I’ll bet you could pop off a few quick examples, right?   

     Surviving a stressful economy requires businesses to do things differently.  We can’t all, arguably, qualify for government bailouts, so we’re backed into corners.  Because we know from life about logistic concepts like “strength in numbers,” we may of necessity end up choosing to combine forces with diverse, even competitive entities. 

     But that’s not a bad thing when it comes to, for example, sharing marketing expenses — unless your egotistical needs to run your own show are too big for you to justify teaming up with others.  That is a bad thing.

     By joining forces, a great deal more becomes possible in terms of both stimulating sales results and saving promotional dollars. 

     One of the most successful regional advertising campaigns I ever produced was for a major lumber company (that also sells a great deal of hardware), which featured wholehearted advertising and promotional endorsement exchanges with a major hardware store (that sold a little lumber) that was located a block away. 

     The two family-owned entities had battled one another for generations, but the advent of a giant home center moving into the area (that would sell both lumber and hardware) prompted the odd bedfellows arrangement. 

     The two retailers combined advertising dollars, and alternated sponsorship messages that always featured testimonials from the other.  Both businesses increased sales and, by working together, both were able to cut marketing expenses.  Each successfully reduced spending totals by one-third while gaining one-third more exposure than they each started with. 

      The home center backed off to a more distant location.

     Contractors, physicians, lawyers, accountants, and others commonly share customer, patient and client referrals.  Online companies engage in cooperative ventures literally every minute of every hour.

     Print and broadcast media often swap space for airtime, and will often barter advertising packages for products and services that they can use as give-aways and contest prizes to gain readership and listenership and viewers.      

     So it’s nothing new.  What’s new is the economic squeeze that pushes considerations of cooperative business marketing efforts to the front burner.  And the time to turn on that front burner is now.  A little receptivity and a lot of responsiveness are the prime ingredients to make combined efforts be productive.  Surely you can muster those? 

     My Father always used to say, “He who hesitates is lost!”  And my Mother always added something about “A word to the wise . . .”     halalpiar

# # #

See Nov 29th post (below) for New Year’s contest prize and rules – Then GO FOR IT!  Emails to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com with “SOUNDS OF THE SEASON” in the subject line.  # # #

Check out and contribute to the daily growing 7-Word Story started 86 days ago (inside a coffin).  Click on the link to the right, or go to the “BOOKS” tab at the top of this page, then to the top headline link.

Every business

 has a responsibility 

to those who support, 

patronize, and service it. 

     I just heard a great radio commercial about two competitive antique stores right near each other that urged listeners to visit both places!  Can you imagine? 

     Do the businesses in your town cooperate and help one another, or do they seem to be out for themselves?  Is business cooperation real or just given lip service?

     Local business organizations seem to breed more in-fighting and one-upmanship games than genuine teamwork efforts to support the growth of area business.  One exception appears to be the Market Street “arts” or “creative” district undergoing major revitalization in downtown Wilmington, Delaware.

     Unfortunately, however, business teamwork face-liftings like this are rarely the norm.  “There’s always a small band of energetic active members,” reports one frustrated chamber of commerce leader I spoke with recently, “but they can never seem to put a fire under the others — the majority.  Our more aggressive businesspeople end up going under, over, or around the rest of our membership.  Our efforts are not nearly as representative of the town’s businesses as we like to think they are.”  

     One Virginia merchant chatted freely about her refusal to be involved because, she says, “All these organizations are the same: they collect dues, fees, subscriptions, and donations and either do nothing to promote business in town because they can’t agree on what to do, or they do things that benefit only a few businesses — the most active, or the biggest (which of course pay the highest amounts).”  

     “She’s right,” chimed in a neighboring business owner who happened by.  “Or, the other extreme is that whenever one of these so-called business organizations ends up doing something, it gets so completely screwed up because it ends up being done in such an unbusinesslike manner.  It’s embarassing!”  Hmmmmm.  Y’think?

     A New Jersey retailer/friend said, “Every year, I get membership sales pitch calls from the local chamber of commerce, the county chamber of commerce, the state chamber of commerce, the national chamber of commerce, the National Federation of Independent Business, the Small Business Administration, the local merchants’ association, the Better Business Bureau, you name it!  If I could afford all these memberships, I’d be making so much money I wouldn’t need their help!”

     Add to this list, solicitations from youth and senior groups; athletic teams; health and education  programs; charitable organizations; community food banks; fire and police departments; EMT and first aid squads; state police; high school and college organizations, and on and on. 

     Every one most certainly a worthy cause.  It’s simply that running a financially successful-enough business to be able to afford to help all these fine folks when they come knocking at the door becomes increasingly difficult if not impossible.

     The best way to avoid the upset feelings that accompany making (or not being able to make) these kinds of contributions is to be sure to budget them in as a normal cost of doing business, to stick with what you’ve bugeted (and tell unexpected solicitors you’ll consider them for next year’s budget, or simply include a contingency fund in your budgeting for “emergency” situations). 

     Of course it’s also worth remembering that the vast majority of these causes is tax-deductible, and –most importantly– that every business has a responsibility to the community that supports and services it, and to the support services in that community!

     As for building more cooperative and more supportive attitutes between neighboring businesses, tune in tomorrow!   halalpiar   

# # #

See Nov 29th post (below) for New Year’s contest prize and rules – Then GO FOR IT!  Emails to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com with “SOUNDS OF THE SEASON” in the subject line.  # # #

Check out and contribute to the daily growing 7-Word Story started 85 days ago (inside a coffin).  Click on the link to the right, or go to the “BOOKS” tab at the top of this page, then to the top headline link.

This is the time

  between waves. 

     Have you ever noticed the utter serenity of the sea in between waves? 

     How much is that like your life and the work you do? 

     Thanksgiving visits and family were here in a tidal wave (perhaps more like a tsunami for some), and gone . . . tiny stones and shells aclatter, scamper down the beach in withdrawal as the tide turns low. 

     Business activity slows incrementally to more of a crawl each day between now and New Year’s when it all grinds to a halt.  Ah, but not for entrepreneurs or manufacturers!  Not for writers!  Not for retailers!  Not for emergency personnel!  Not for those forced out of work by economic uncertainty.   

     This is the time between waves. 

     Now is when small business owners and operators and manufacturing enterprise management can finally take a breather from the year-long pounding of phones, faxes, mail deliveries, media broadcasts, meetings, conferences, emails, text messages, trade shows, endless travel itineraries, and industry reports, and get some real work done.

     Now is when their attentions shift to strategizing, planning, scheduling, catch-up reading, assessing, courtesy-calling, audits and inventories, and getting ready for the next big wave in January. 

     Writers?  Yup!  Now is when writers can drop back from their day-to-day discipline and actually review what they’ve done; this time between waves is the perfect time to edit and polish and prepare to get the manuscript or feature story done, to get an agent, get a publisher, get a direction for developing more freelance work. 

     Retailers?  Let’s not even go there.  This between waves time is “make it or break it.”  No time even to think. 

     Emergency personnel?  We all know that emergencies never stop and, if anything, they increase dramatically during the holiday season . . . and afterward, especially during the depression-heightened month of January! 

     So holidays mean relaxing business ebbs for some, and ulcerous anxieties for others.  Where are you right now?  You’re definitely not a retailer or EMT or ER nurse because you’d never have time to read this. 

     So since you are reading this far, it might be useful to remind yourself to make the choice to take full advantage of being between the waves.  It’s easy to get caught up in nonproductive activities, but you won’t get this valuable “down time” back until –maybe– the end of next year!  DO relax, but don’t fade away.        

     If you’re out of work, don’t count yourself out and head for the bridge.  You have the ability to pull yourself back up, kick yourself in the butt (a bit tricky, but not impossible for most!), and propel yourself forward back into the job market. 

     Remember that every problem that a company has is an opportunity for you to find the job that’s right for you, either in that company or another.  Stop beating yourself up.  Get focused.  And go for it!  Make it happen!  You can do it if you really want to.  All behavior is a choice.  Choose to make it easy

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Open  Minds  Open  Doors

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

With all this fowlness in the air

     Okay, so I’m thinking if he looks like a turkey, and moves herkey-jerky like a turkey, and gobbles like a turkey, he’s not a duck! 

     Regrettably, however, because mixed feather-beds can be confusing when it’s time to get some sleep, the talkative new leader of all the other turkeys has managed to exercise his powerful gobbling to attract some duck followers as well. 

     With all this fowlness in the air, it’s surprising to hear the turkey leader hasn’t been able to find adequate appointees to the upper echelon of turkeys . . . strong active turkeys who get the pecking orders straight. 

     No, instead, the new turkey boss has thusfar selected a scrawny gaggle whose get-things-done qualifications flutter aimlessly around their experiences of having already spent themselves trying to appease the whims of their past leaders.

     This collection of left-limping turkeys he plans to surround his nest with, is, I suppose,  better, in a way, certainly, than the unscrupulous and anti-flying creature contingent of past associations, but not much better. 

     The top turkey’s choices are also hardly satisfying, or instilling of confidence to those who feed them.  Though, alas, the turkey chieftain resolutely declares his choices to be “fresh faces.” 

     This means that all the turkeys in the land –and that bunch of misdirected ducks– will accept the appointee collection on (fresh) face value.  [And turkeys, you may want to remember, are not among those creatures God has blessed with great-looking faces!]    

     Perchance the turkey boss has forgotten these worn out fresh faces were spent years ago accomplishing nothing in the footsteps of their then do-nothing turkey leaders?  Who exactly are we talking about here? what past leaders? you may ask. 

     Oh, please, surely you know.  Remember the one who was preoccupied with the varied uses of Cuban cigars that were –like other similar products– tried but never inhaled?  And still he hangs around like arm-candy under his turkey-wife’s wing.

     Or, then there was the homely peanut farmer who turkeys, ducks (even pigeons) wish would just go back to quietly tending (shelling and salting?).  Surely those products of his would be more appeasing to elephants on the cusp of a stampede than his meddling insistence on beating the bushes to stir up the natives. 

     [Maybe none of the other turkeys have told the ex-turkey boss, or the new one, that elephants can’t “reach across the aisle” when the turkeys on the other side are all swinging machetes?]   halalpiar

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