May 09 2012
HAPPINESS IS THE WAY!
There is no way
to happiness.
Happiness IS the way!
Stop looking for the finish line. Watch your feet. Happiness is not the destination. Happiness is the journey.
If you’re having trouble getting that message, it’s because you’ve consciously or unconsciously chosen to set yourself up to get brainwashed into thinking that nothing of any value exists besides the future. Well, in fact, dwelling on the past that’s over and can’t be changed is equally neurotic to being focused on the future that hasn’t yet come . . . and may never!
This futures mindset is a common occurance with salespeople who live to reach and exceed their weekly and monthly and quarterly and annual goals. Nothing wrong with goals that are specific, realistic, flexible, due-dated, and written. But the blind pursuit of any target that doesn’t measure up to all five of those criteria is simply a futile wish-list chase into fantasyland.
Talk with a car salesperson to get a better perspective on how happiness gets lost under reckless abandon to achieve a rigid inflexible goal at all costs.
If a goal is flexible, for example, and it’s clearly not going to be met, it needs simply to be changed — change the amount, the time period, the process, the methods, etc. Effective goals are not meant to be etched in concrete. Meaningful targets are always moving. Effective goal achievers move with them by glancing ahead and staying firmly anchored in the present.
What makes focusing on the future unhealthy? It quickly and easily turns away from being a positive and constructive direction when it stealthily tip-toes over the line into worry. Worrying is a complete waste of time and energy. It produces absolutely nothing except negative stress which rapidly produces illness.
Okay, you’ll grant me that worrying is worthless, so if that’s the problem, what’s the solution? It’s not a magic answer because each of us handles stress differently. So here’s a list of the most common solutions that most people tend to practice in one form or another. Try what sounds right for you, and what seems practical at the time.
Then keep trying until something works, but don’t quit on yourself!
Yoga; swimming; jogging; workouts; walking; singing; dancing; deep breathing; massage therapy; crafts; playing with a baby; playing with kids of any age; playing with pets; keeping a journal or diary; visiting another close environment (woods, beach, etc.); reading fiction; watching a cartoon; drawing/sketching/painting; fixing a meal (if this is not something you usually do); listening to music with your eyes closed . . .
The point is to know when you’re starting to feel stressed (this can be the most challenging part of the solution) and then to stop whatever you’re doing and do something different for a minute, an hour, a day . . . whatever’s appropriate for you, now.
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