Pity all you want, but

nothing happens ’til you’ve

put yourself in other’s shoes.

     Okay, you’re a leader. You own and/or operate and/or manage a business, or part of one (or you’re a sales professional, which is essentially the same thing!). You need to wear many hats, day to day, and probably one of the most difficult of these to keep balanced on your head (and for most leaders) is the one that dictates your role when serious, draining emotional problems arise.

     Odds are you have no training as a shrink or you would be one, and it’s bad enough being constantly looked upon by others who think of you (and sometimes openly treat you) as a surrogate parent … then along comes tragedy, or calamity, or personal, or family, or community, or even a company upset or grief period.

     And it’s often hard to know how to respond.

     First of all, respond. When you can respond instead of react, you can never over-react, and you will more likely than not help others to also respond instead of react too. That’s a good thing. HOW do you make that happen? First recognize that responding instead of reacting (like all behavior) is a choice! Next, try:  http://bit.ly/Bb1Tw 

     When you can focus your response energy on empathy and being empathetic (which the dictionary defines as “understanding and sharing the feelings of others”), you can help yourself and others to be immensely relieved, productive, positive, and motivating.

     When you focus instead on sympathy and being sympathetic (which the dictionary defines as “feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s misfortune”), it’s rare to experience an outcome that’s anything more than one that has simply piled on more pity and sorrow.

     We need only to turn to what’s probably the greatest exampleof our lifetimes — in the defining behavior, for example, exercised by “America’s Mayor” Rudy Giuliani after the infamous terrorist attacks of “9/11” — for inspiration and a lesson in the values of using empathy in leadership. His ability to put himself in other’s shoes, and to help a panicked nation be there with him by virtue of his acts and words, sprouted calm and order and honor and harmony from the chaos.

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No Room In The Inn for

Obsessive-Compulsives

• Cleaning and grooming, such as washing hands, showering or brushing teeth over and over again
• Checking drawers, door locks and appliances to be sure they are shut, locked or turned off
• Repeating, such as going in and out of a door, sitting down and getting up from a chair, or touching certain objects several times
• Ordering and arranging items in certain ways
• Counting over and over to a certain number
• Saving newspapers, mail or containers when they are no longer needed
• Seeking constant reassurance and approval

     What causes OCD?  There’s no single, proven cause. Some research shows that it may have to do with brain chemicals that carry messages from one nerve cell to another. One of these chemicals, serotonin, helps keep people from repeating the same behaviors over and over again. Someone with OCD may not have enough serotonin. Many people with OCD can function better when they take medicines that increase the amount of serotonin in their brain.

     Are other illnesses associated with OCD?  People who have OCD often have other kinds of anxiety, like phobias (such as fear of spiders or fear of flying) or panic attacks. They may also have depression, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), an eating disorder, or a learning disorder such as dyslexia. Having one or more of these disorders can make diagnosis and treatment more difficult, so it’s important to talk to a medical doctor about any symptoms present.

Source:  www.FamilyDoctor.org  and

The American Academy of Family Physicians

Healthcare Dictatorship?

In this week’s Wall Street Journal,  former NY State Lt. Governor Betsy McCaughey brought to light some of the small business-impact details buried in House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s 1,990-page health bill (H.R.3962) that you need to know about:

The government will require

EVERYone to:

     • Enroll in a “QUALIFIED PLAN.”  Sec. 202 (p. 91-92) of the bill requires that if you get your insurance at work, employers will have a “grace period” to switch you to a “QUALIFIED PLAN,” meaning a plan designed by the Secretary of Health and Human Services. If you buy your own insurance, there’s no grace period. You’ll have to enroll in a qualified plan as soon as any term in your contract changes, such as the co-pay, deductible or benefit.

     • Be legally required to pay  whatever the Secretary of Health and Human Services decides what a “QUALIFIED PLAN” covers and what your fees will be. Sec. 224 (p. 118) provides that you will be told an amount 18 months after the bill becomes law. That,” says Ms. McCaughey, is like a banker telling you to sign the loan agreement now, then filling in the interest rate and repayment terms 18 months later.

On 11/2/09, the Congressional Budget Office estimated an individual earning $44,000 before taxes who purchases his own insurance will have to pay a $5,300 premium and $2,000 in out-of-pocket expenses: total $7,300 a year, which is 17% of his pre-tax income. A family earning $102,100 a year before taxes will have to pay a $15,000 premium plus $5,300 out-of-pocket: $20,300 total, or 20% of its pre-tax income. Individuals and families earning less will be eligible for subsidies paid direct to  insurers.

     • Adhere to a “one-size-fits-all” QUALIFIED PLAN  even though it doesn’t exist. See Sec. 303 (pp. 167-168) The bill claims to offer choice—basic, enhanced and premium levels—but benefits are the same. Only co-pays and deductibles differ. You will have to enroll in the same plan, whether the government is paying for it or you or your employer are.

     • Include proof in your taxes that you are in a QUALIFIED PLAN.  Sec. 59b (pp. 297-299) If you don’t, you will be fined thousands of dollars. Illegal immigrants are exempt.

Sec. 412 (p. 272) says that employers must provide a “QUALIFIED PLAN” for their employees and pay 72.5% of the cost, and a smaller share of family coverage, or incur an 8% payroll tax. Smaller payroll businesses are fined less.

     The bill Sec. 1302 (pp. 672-692) cuts future Medicare funding by $500 Billion, takes away patient rights to choose which doctor to see, permits the government to dictate treatment decisions, and specifies patients may have to accept a nurse practitioner instead of a physician.

     • Secs. 1158-1160 (pp. 499-520) reduces payments for care and the standard of care for hospital patients in higher cost areas such as New York and Florida.

     • Sec. 1161 (pp. 520-545) cuts payments to Medicare Advantage plans (used by 20% of seniors) expected to cut back benefits such as vision and dental care.

While the bill will slash Medicare funding, it will also direct Billions of dollars to numerous inner-city social work and diversity programs with vague standards of accountability.

     • Sec. 399V (p. 1422) provides for grants to community “entities” with no required qualifications except having “documented community activity and experience with community healthcare workers” to “educate, guide, and provide experiential learning opportunities” aimed at drug abuse, poor nutrition, smoking and obesity.    

     • Sec. 222 (p. 617) provides reimbursement for training healthcare workers to inform Medicare beneficiaries of their right to an interpreter.

     • Secs. 2521 and 2533 (pp. 1379 and 1437) establishes racial and ethnic preferences in awarding grants for training nurses and creating secondary-school health science programs.     

 And all of this is just the tip of the iceberg! For the text of the bill with page numbers, see www.defendyourhealthcare.us     

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Listen To Yo Mama!

     Remember those stern warnings  you used to get, but don’t anymore because now you’re a hot-shot business owner or manager and you don’t need anybody telling you what to do anymore?

     Remember being told  to “Listen To Yo Mama!” and you would study your feet and mumble some feeble “Yes’am” or “Yessir” then back out the kitchen door with your tail between your legs because you knew in your heart that Mama was right? Remember?

     And nobody dares tell you that stuff now, now  that you’re the boss? Ah, but bear with me here. Just read a little more. Why? Because you don’t sign my paycheck, so I can tell you what I think straightout! Here it is. Ready?

     If you don’t take care of you,  you can’t be any good to anyone else . . . and you certainly aren’t going to make your business work from a hospital bed! (Sound like Mama?) Well, my dear blog visiting business-minded muckity-muck, just because nobody is on your case about if and when and how you take care of your SELF, doesn’t excuse you from stepping up to the plate!

     Yeah, yeah, yeah,  you say. But you know what? If you don’t eat right, nobody else will do it for you. If you don’t sleep right, nobody else will do it for you. If you don’t exercise enough, nobody else will do it for you. If you don’t quit smoking and drink in moderation, nobody else will do it for you. If you don’t switch from drugs to vitamins, nobody else will do it for you.

     Oh, and of course, if you don’t take enough deep breaths: http://bit.ly/Bb1Tw . . . well, there are machines that can help. The bottom line is that when you are not taking care of you, you are not taking care of your business, and the whole enchilada is YOUR CHOICE!

     We CHOOSE our behavior.  Okay, so why on Earth would you choose to want to continue with self-destruct behaviors that will kill you AND your business (as MY mother used to put it) in two shakes of a lamb’s tail (and THAT’s pretty quick!) when you have SO much opportunity ahead of you?

     Do us a favor, okay?  When you wake up tomorrow morning, clap your hands together twice as Zig Ziglar suggests, and say (with as much enthusiasm as you can):

OH BOY! WHAT A GREAT DAY TO GET UP AND GET TO IT. I BELIEVE SOMETHING WONDERFUL IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME TODAY!”

     Then keep choosing  to take care of your SELF all day because you’ll be choosing to get both your business self and your business together like you’ve never been together before. Go on, do it! Just do it for three days in a row. You might surprise yourself . . . and maybe even jumpstart your sales! (and this advice is not only proven; it’s cheaper than a lottery ticket!)     

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Get Yourself Cranked

In One Minute FREE!

Let me tell you, you haven’t lived until you’ve gotten something this good for free. And it works, and there are no sales gimmicks or strings attached. It simply is good solid proven stuff that I taught for many years in high-priced management training programs. And here it is for my blog visitors just for visiting!

If you own or run or manage or operate a business or part of a business, you are probably already a partial nutcase so I won’t try to make you sane. But I WILL give you a technique you can use every day, over and over, that I guarantee will make a difference for you if you are your usual tenacious self about following through.

Best times for this:

• 1. As soon as you wake up in the morning
• 2. Before you go to bed at night
• 3. While exercising (especially in rhythm to your walking or jogging or lifting or stretching)
• 4. Every time you can possibly think of it during the night or workday, and can sneak in 60 seconds

Take the following as a guide and adapt it to your SELF. Say it convincingly to yourself as much as you possibly can for 21 days.

If you do this with serious concentration and conviction and enthusiasm (even when you don’t feel enthusiastic and even when you are NOT all of the things you are saying to yourself!), you will be truly amazed at the results you produce within a short period of time. 

Ready? Here you go… 132 words… CHANT!

“Healing energy in; healing energy in; healing swirling white light into my body.  

I AM my body: left/right/center. 

I am relaxed, happy, alert, safe and sound, healthy (I’m getting younger every day, stronger every day, more flexible every day, healthier every day), wealthy (all my bills are paid; all my debts are paid; money comes easily and frequently). 

I am painfree day and night; my mind and emotions are clear; I am staying at my ideal weight of xxx pounds and am physically fit. 

I sleep easily and wake up when I need to, feeling rested and alert.  

I treat all people, animals and plants with caring and respect. I recognize that everyone I meet is fighting SOME kind of battle.

Something wonderful is going to happen to me today!”

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 Right this minute,

is what you are doing

helping you get to

where you want to go?

     Oh, c’mon now,  I can’t be that productive every single minute; I’d be a robot! Yes, this is true; you’d be a robot; well, let’s say it’s  probably true, but you CAN be productive a whole lot more than you are right now and a whole lot more than you think you can be…and, uh, not be a robot.

     Here’s the trick:  Focus your brain on trying to be “here and now” as much as you possibly can, every passing moment. No, you’re not likely to succeed at it 100% of the time. And even 50% of the time may prove daunting. But if you are at 10% and go to 20%, that’s a major victory that will yield major benefits. Work your way to 30%, 4o%? You’re headed for the mountaintop!

     Why “here and now”?  Because everything else is fantasy, and you’re living in a reality world. When your dominant thoughts revolve around past and / or future events, ideas, experiences most of the time, it’s like trying to relocate Disneyland into a war zone.

     Your focus is not in tune  with what’s happening around you, and that’s wasted time and effort that you will never get back. (Er, in case you DO figure out how to get it back, call me collect immediately; I’ll make us both billionaires!)

     Sure, Hal, you make it sound easy,  but it’s pretty hard to not get worried about future stuff or to avoid dwelling on the past. How can I do that?

     Ah, funny you should ask.  First of all, recognize that we are talking about CHOICE. Your behavior is your choice. It can be conscious or unconscious, but it is a choice … or it’s a choice that sets up the behavior. Okay, so recognizing it’s a choice means also realizing that it’s as simple to choose to be tuned in to the present as it is to choose not to be.

     Next: Take ONE MINUTE out of your nerve-racking fast-lane life  and take some deep breaths. That will help, you get in touch with the most immediate “here and now” thing happening in your entire life: your breathing!

     If you do this in earnest, I guarantee you positive results, and I guarantee you it will help you get yourself focused on “here and now.”  IT CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOR THE BETTER RIGHT NOW IN JUST ONE MINUTE!

     You will be more productive more often, starting right this minute!  What have you got to lose? Wasted efforts? GO FOR IT!   

# # #               

“As a man thinketh, so is he.”

— THE OLD TESTAMENT

“You become

what you think about.”

— EARL NIGHTINGALE

     Don’t roll your eyes  and raise your sarcasm to a fever pitch until you try it. If you REALLY try it with your whole heart and soul and a burning desire, you will prove that initial resistance attitude wrong. All wrong.

You will do it IF YOU WILL DO IT! 

     And what do you guess  is the only thing that can keep you from doing it, from becoming what you think about? Well, now, if you know me, you can probably guess the answer.

     If you’re a new or infrequent visitor to this blog, you may not know that I constantly bang away at the realization you may want to consider (that behavioral science studies have proven conclusively) that all human behavior is a conscious or unconscious choice.

     If you pretend  that you are unable to become what you think about (now, I do mean really and truly brainwash yourself, and mercilessly drive yourself to the finish line, vs. a token ten-minute or ten-hour or ten-day or ten-week or ten-month commitment), then you must know that “un-ableness” is a behavior.

… and doesn’t that then make it a conscious or unconscious choice? 

Of course it does.

So why doesn’t EVERYone make the choice to become what she or he thinks about?

A)  Most people don’t choose to realize it’s a choice.

B)  Many people don’t choose to accept that it’s a choice, and

C)  Even those who do choose to realize and accept that the behavior of becoming what you think about is a choice choose to make it hard for themselves for that to happen.

— ————————

     It’s just as easy, often easier in fact,  to consciously choose for a behavior to be easy as it is to consciously or unconsciously choose for it to be hard.

     So, let’s suppose you’re on the hunt  for a relationship (love or business makes no difference to the process) or perhaps some massive amount of income. And if you’ve ever hunted anything, you know that it requires complete and total focus to be successful.

     So, how important to you is what you’re seeking?  If it’s genuinely worth it, turn on the charm and 1) think yourself succeeding, 2) think yourself succeeding, 3) think yourself succeeding as much as you can, every minute, every hour, every day.

     You must see yourself  in your mind’s eye enjoying your reward. Don’t want to do all that? Then you’re not serious about it, so just go back to that can of beer and your spider solitaire game, or TV football or soap opera, and call it a day. Oh, and stop torturing yourself with promises to do better. Just accept that becoming what you think about is a choice that you don’t choose to make.

     If you’re willing to choose  to accept the challenge of thinking yourself into success, however and you’re ready to choose to go for it, and pursue what you want even through the miserably low periods you’re certain to encounter (because we can’t control everything that’s outside of our minds), then do it. And call or email me to tell me about it.

     The people who believe all this are the ones who have done it. That alone should be a message! 

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Your FREE subscription: Posts RSS Feed

Hal@Businessworks.US or 302.933.0116

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson]

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals. God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

When You Can’t Get +

Don’t Settle For –

     We are all humans  (I believe; at least my blog diagnostics don’t show quality visits here from Animal Planet — or any other planet, for that matter!) and because we are (human), it is part of our pattern of emotional instincts that when we cannot get positive recognition, we settle for ANY kind of recognition, and will sometimes resort to seeking NEGATIVE recognition when nothing else is forthcoming.

     Negative recognition  is, after all, better than no recognition at all, right? Wrong! Unless of course you happen to be 3 years-old … or a manic-depressant … or a masochist … or a hermit … or a piece of broccoli! 

     Aha!  But many of us ACT 3 years-old when we are not getting pats on the back (or fanny, if you’re on a sports team; or on your knee or the back of your hand if you’re a patient … why do doctors always pat reassurance into your knee or back of your hand?) This is true for sure.

     The point is  that seeking negative recognition is a mentally unbalanced and emotionally unhealthy behavior. Consider if you will that those who make a practice of this, are those who frequently prompt wars, fights, arguments, teenage “groundings” (remember those?), military court-marshals, disciplinary actions, prejudice, divorce, abandonment, murder, jail terms, HIGH risk!

     When we can’t get positive recognition  for something we’ve done or said or thought, we have a tendency to turn in the direction of seeking some alternative (vs. just letting it go, because letting go is life’s most difficult task!) In other words, we drag ourselves down to the point where getting verbally bashed actually serves as a payoff!

     Yeah, right;  poor me; I really did screw up; I deserve all the criticism; beat me! (HA!HA! At least I finally got myself noticed!) Hey, folks: this is a sick mental/emotional state that calls for professional guidance. We all take it on the chin sometimes, but when someone is out seeking to take it on the chin, there’s a problem there.

     If that someone is you, get help! If it’s someone who works for you, get that person help. Having to evidence negative behavior to get noticed (ala temper tantrums) can end up costing your your business, lickity-split! It only takes one knife-blade, one bullet, one match!

     Remember all behavior is a choice.

     Some people get stuck not realizing or practicing that. Sometimes a professional is the best one to get that behavior UNstuck. 

     Oh, one other thought,  be more conscious of how important positive recognition is to 99.99% of all employees (and children) and make a practice of dishing it out a whole lot more than you probably think is needed or appropriate. It’s hard to offer too much

# # #

What’s eating you is

what you are eating.

     Now, waitaminute!  I am not some flaky diet fanatic who claims to know the best ways to get your minimum daily calorie, saturated fat, lard and grease requirements. I am not on any brown rice and bean crusade. And I could care less if you think the Food Pyramid belongs in the desert somewhere.

     Here’s what I have to say:  You own or operate a business and/or you are an entrepreneur or you manage a business or a big chunk of a business, and/or you’re a professional salesperson. The last thing you need is to have to be sick in bed, run dry of energy, be speeding your brains out on the amphetamines in diet drugs, or getting any fatter than you are, right?

     Then why do you insist  on inventing reasons that you can only afford the time or the money to subsist on Oreos, Coke and Pepsi, Dunkin Donuts, Big Macs, Gummy Bears, Kentucky Fried Chicken, whipped cream in your latte, butter/syrup/jelly AND powdered sugar on your pancakes, 3-martini lunches, and those foil-wrapped dark chocolate and potato-chip stashes you keep hidden in your purse or briefcase?

     I’m not even going to talk about  all the big-time clogged artery-type physical ailments that accompany junkfood dependency. Let’s just stick with business stuff here. Are you REALLY serious about making your business work? If you are, you need to be REALLY serious about making yourSELF work because it takes two to tango (or even lap dance!).

     If you’re finding yourself  getting more irritable lately, don’t blame it on the economy. But you might want to do an honest assessment of what you’ve been eating and drinking. If you’re not sleeping well, and you’re tired a lot, take an inventory of what you’ve been eating and drinking.

     Yes, you CAN change it.  Yes, you CAN have a more successful business. Yes, you CAN start to get yourself to eat better without having to wait for your birthday or a New Year’s Resolution. All you have to do is make the choice. It’s really that simple. If you think it’s too hard, choose for it to not be hard. All behavior –let me say that again– ALL BEHAVIOR is a choice!

     Why make choices  that will make you and your business suffer? Besides, your better eating choices will make you and your business healthier, and that will increase the odds you return to this site again looking for more “food for thought”… and your return visits will make me very happy. (So, okay, do it for me then.) Happy better-eating-choices weekend!   

# # # 

Doctors were never intended

to be businesspeople.

     Doctors teach  us every day how NOT to run a business. They are over-stressed, under-nourished, over their heads financially, and under the radar of best business practices. Sure there are exceptions. There are exceptions in every field of endeavor.

     But after 25 years  of working as a practice development business consultant and a personal and professional growth and development counselor to physicians and healthcare executives, I know whereof I speak.

     More than half  of the thousand-plus doctors I have known and worked with never wanted to be doctors in the first place. Many were pushed into it by well-intentioned parents who saw only the media-glorified healer earning big bucks… parents who pulled their buggy whips out of storage.

     I don’t know any longer,  but only a few short years ago, the average doctor only lived to be 58 years old. The stress of the work is literally inhuman. Medical schools and training, like military boot camps, breed and cultivate stress. Some good reasons, but mostly not.

     Ridiculous nonstop work shifts  that can only be maintained with easy-access sugar snacks and self-prescribed amphetamines carry over into reality as doctors face the need to juggle (and drum up) patients and referrals, manage staffs and offices or facilities, run businesses, comply with insurance dictates and every type of regulation imaginable, then cope with malpractice issues… oh, right, and maybe even have families. No thanks.

     Yeah, but think of the money.  I know of surgeons who take home close to two million dollars a year after taxes. Without exception, they are physical wrecks, with severely fractured family lives, if any, and have forgotten to laugh… and pray… and eat right… and sleep right… and exercise… and be happy!

     Many drink too much  or pop too many pills or live like zombies. So, yeah, think of the money.

     The bottom line is  that we need to give doctors a break. They don’t have any inventory to sell, or staff who can step up to let them take time off to rest or vacation more than a few days. They are devoted to delivering care to patients but won’t get paid by insurance companies if they spend too many minutes with each patient.

     Oh, and the insurance companies  often don’t pay the doctor until many months after patient care is delivered, and even then it’s typically a nightmare trying to collect what’s owed. Healthcare screw-ups are not because of doctors.

     And healthcare screw-ups  will NOT be solved by any kind of universal federal government mandates. A competitive business arena must exist if healthcare is in fact ever to be viable and available to all. And physicians must be allowed to be an integral part of the process. They deserve the opportunity to deliver quality care without politician interference. 

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