Breaking Your Back?

Your Word?  Someone’s Heart?

Did you know “STRESS” costs employers over $300 Billion a year?

After 35 years of teaching stress management to business and healthcare professionals, I believe ALL suffering comes from some form of self-induced stress. And studies I’ve seen show that more than 7 out of 10 doctors agree.

Stress does not come from outside sources. Nothing and no one can MAKE us stressful. Stress comes from INSIDE (and until it becomes negative stress, or DIS-stress, it’s not always bad; without positive stress, you’d fall out of your chair!)

Some of us clearly work too hard physically, and suffer physical consequences: backaches, headaches, pulled muscles, sore feet, cut and calloused hands, aching fingers, an increasingly-wrinkled brow –and of course more– can all take their toll. Ask any roofer!

• We blame every thing and every body outside of ourselves all along the way, truly feeling like we are, in fact, “breaking our backs.”

• Yet others of us may put ourselves in the mental/emotional stress-inducing position “between a rock and a hard place” when something happens (or fails to) that causes us to break our WORD.

But unlike the physical “break your back” labor, “breaking your word” is most often accompanied by tightened muscles, mental distractions, angry feelings, feelings of incompetence or inadequacy, emotional outbursts and mental stress, to name just a few symptoms.

• Breaking someone’s HEART can be the most destructive stress of all — and especially if it comes packaged with either and/or both of the above circumstances.

Most human beings (and, I believe, many animals) have had their hearts broken somewhere along the path of life, and know that this is the most traumatizing of all experiences because it goes to the very core of every creature’s emotional existence. And it often triggers an avalanche of mental, emotional AND physical stress!

Regardless of the source we attribute to increased stress— whether physical, intellectual, or emotional– we often head for the nearest relief.

This runs the gamut between medicine cabinets, then drugstores (or dealers), alcohol, tobacco, fortune-tellers, natural healing practitioners, dieticians and chiropractors, primary care physicians, and hopefully, we avoid hospitals and surgery… until next time.

BUT THE BOTTOM LINE is that:

A) Behavior is a choice! That choice can be the moment of upset, or the result of a choice made even years earlier. It is nonetheless, a choice. That being the case, it can be just as easy to make the choice –at the moment of upset– to NOT break your back, choose to NOT break your word, choose to NOT break a heart.

B) The “HOW-TO” of choosing to reverse direction to get better results dictates that your mind be in the present moment, not dwelling on anything more than a minute old (or a minute into the future). It can admittedly be difficult to conjure up present-moment awareness in the midst of trauma . . . unless you choose for it to be easy!

C) The best, easiest, most-effective way to choose a non-stress-imposing action or thought to eliminate or minimize the trauma of the moment is to first: be aware of and acknowledge your upset feelings, and remind yourself that you are choosing them, then: second…

D) Follow the simple, quick, discreet (the more you practice, the less noticeable) steps outlined HERE . Your persistence at doing this even for a minute, even while in a discussion, will calm your nervous system and send more oxygen to your brain. It works no matter what age, physical condition, or type of upset feelings.

MORE?

Give me a call. I run sessions like this by phone,

and in person with employee groups and teams

to help relieve the employer burden of paying

for the results of employee stress.

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hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

931.854.0474 Coaching for Higher Branding Impact

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Personal & Professional Growth/ Creative Entrepreneurial Thinking

WISHING FOR CREATIVITY?

Take this lesson from farmers:

Stop wishing and start cultivating!

• If you truly seek or expect creativity (or crops)  to flourish—plan your objectives, strategies, and tactics… dig the soil, get rid of the rocks, add nutrients, plant seeds, provide water, allow for sunshine, and get rid of energy-draining weeds.

  

• If of course you prefer fantasyland, go right ahead. But for your own wellbeing and those who live and work with you, don’t waste time looking for shortcuts, and don’t waste energy under some false pretense that you dwell in reality.

• So, okay, you ARE serious about wanting to be more creative, and/or wanting to find more creative souls to support your quest, here are some tips I guarantee will kickstart your creative juices, or the talents of those to whom you delegate. And age is not a factor.

• Study and practice stress management so your emotions, body and mind are better prepared to free up and stimulate creative deeds and thoughts that already exist. You may think you or someone else has no real creative skills, but the truth is that the talent IS there; it just may not have been productively stimulated. Learn how to use deep breathing to untangle your creative spirit.

• 
  

  Dismiss trivial, unimportant problems. Farmers don’t bother with stray pebbles. Stop torturing your mind. Simply learn to say to yourself: “Oh, well…” and then move on, when small things don’t go your way. Expectations, remember, breed disappointment.

• Do things differently. If you wash your left side first when you shower, switch over to wash your right side first. Take a different road to work than you normally do, even if it means getting up a few minutes earlier. Notice what you see along the way. Force yourself out of bed one morning and watch the sun rise. Serious!

• Take creativity trips and make creativity visits… fair grounds, animated movies, art and sculpture museums, a symphony instead of “Top 40,” a crafts show, daycare center or kindergarten, experimental theatre, an animal shelter, flower gardens, zoo, waterfalls, caverns, rivers, lakes, the ocean, a walk in the woods… ANY AND ALL with your eyes and ears and nose and tongue and fingertips alert to what’s new and different.

• OBSERVE people. Sit with a notebook in Grand Central or Union Station, or a sidewalk café, a high school or college sporting event you wouldn’t normally visit, a graveyard or cemetery, ask for a tour of your local fire department, or—if you’re really brave and have a strong stomach—a local jail. Visit a manufacturing plant… and observe and listen and absorb new images and thoughts and ideas.

• Keep a journal for 3 weeks. Date each entry. Heading for left-hand page: “WHAT HAPPENED” and for facing right-hand page: “HOW I FELT.” Among other things, this helps improve your ability to separate fact from opinion. Can’t think of what to write? Then draw something. Spit on the page. Do SOMEthing each day!

• All this is for openers. And completely up to you. But if you want more, let me know.

If you stumble and fall, get up.

Brush yourself off.

Think about what happened.

Adjust the process or steps you took.

Then do it again!

After all, your new found channels of

creativity could be birthing the next

“Nationwide is on your side” or “Got Milk?”

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hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

931.854.0474 Coaching for Higher Branding Impact

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Personal & Professional Growth/ Creative Entrepreneurial Thinking

“Today you are you,

that is truer than true.

There is no one alive

who is youer than you“

— Dr. Seuss

“Show me an authentic boss

. . . I’ll show you a winning leader!”

Real. Actual. Genuine. Bona Fide. Not False or Imitation. “Honest-to-Goodness.” Being Exactly What is Claimed. Good Faith. Sincerity of Intention. Legitimate. “The Real Deal.”

     How many of these qualities do you carry in your pocket and empty onto the table when you’re talking, meeting, and dealing with others? How often? How influenced are you by good or bad moods? By past experiences or self-doubts? By your own past or present choices?

     Does it matter whether the “others” are customers, prospects, employees, associates, investors, or suppliers? Does it matter whether you’re on the phone, in person, texting or emailing?

     How much do incidents, environments, and issues beyond your control play a part?

     What is it that you are most afraid of having others you work with, or sell to, learn about the real you?

What’s in the back of your closet

that you’re choosing to put

in the front of your mind

that’s holding you back from

being the up-front person

you’ve always wanted to be?

     Have you made yourself be a victim of circumstances? Is this an identity you cling to?

     This is not some ridiculous Hollywood exposé, or some empty suit government or political probe. This is about you, your business, your daily performance, and the way you “come across” to others.

     Here’s why it matters. When you own or represent a business, the business is an extension of your ego. It is the career stage on which you have chosen to perform.

     Depending on how true to character you allow yourself to be, and how persuasively you present yourself and ideas, your business will rise and fall with the curtain calls and appreciative audience applause.

     If you elect to play a hard-nosed character, and you’re convincing in that role, you will attract hard-nosed critics and audiences who may not hang around until intermission . . . or who are harder-nosed than you!

     I’m not suggesting you or I or any of us has the ability to simply turn the authenticity faucet on and become (now finally “SAINT“) Mother Teresa. But I am saying that we all have certain qualities of genuineness as human beings.

     Exercising these strengths of character (in spite of closed closets) will serve to free up unnecessarily-guarded business behaviors and–in the process–open opportunities we may never have thought possible.

     It’s a choice that I can encourage, but only you can make. I urge you to take the risk to rise above your past memories, your own doubts and show more customers, employees, and suppliers more of what the real you is all about. Let them see that they can trust your judgement and earn your confidence.

     You don’t have to “become one of the guys” to let others know that you possess compassion and humor alongside your insightful and visionary leadership. Hey, give it a try. You may even like your self better. Have fun!

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

931.854.0474 Coaching for Higher Branding Impact

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Personal & Professional Growth/ Creative Entrepreneurial Thinking

 Business Lesson #3 from FEARLESS! The Musical . . .

 “Less Than Perfect World”

Song Title From: “FEARLESS The Golden Love Musical” ©2014 Valerie Connelly and Nightengale Media, LLC.

“Less Than Perfect”?  Yes, indeed. So accept that fact, and do whatever it takes to stay focused on each present moment as you move on with your life and your business. Here are three how-to’s:

 1. PRACTICE MORE DEEP BREATHING. If you doubt this or aren’t sure what it means or what method works best for businesspeople, try this: Are You Breathing?

2. RESPOND INSTEAD OF REACT. If you don’t React, you can never OVERreact. If you’re puzzled by why this matters or want more than this single truth, try this: Are You Reacting or Responding? 3. STOP THE NEWS. This single step may be the most important light for you in the world’s dark tunnel . . . and perhaps the single hardest task of all.

JUGGLING SEAGULLS?

But if you sometimes start to feel like you’re trying to juggle seagulls . . .

Shut down online, print, TV and radio news for a week! (Will you try it, even for just a day or two?)

Before you click away into the distance at this suggestion, consider the advice I once had from a wise old friend that if something really major happened that was so profoundly important while I was on “news shutdown,” that I could be sure someone would call or text me, or come knocking at my door to tell me about it — and all I will have missed is some reporter’s biased, overkill analysis prompted by the quest for advertising dollars.

The bottom line is that we most assuredly live in —and this is stating it mildly of course— a “Less Than Perfect World.”

We must remember that our behavior is our choice! If we continually choose not to rise above the world’s evils and “imperfections,” and not take a break from them —to be so caught up in all the tragedy that literally fills every second of existence and be obsessed with actively seeking to grasp every nuance of detail— we are choosing failure for ourselves and often for those around us.

By choosing preoccupation with the errors of mankind, we are road- blocking our own talents and pursuits and our own abilities to make a difference!

To rise above the rubble, accept the fact that nothing is “perfect” and work harder at being here-and-now instead of then-and-there. Be “FEARLESS!”

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION             Higher impact. Lower costs.

——————-

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Entrepreneurship & Expansion Coaching    931.854.0474

Go for your goals, thanks for your visit, God Bless You!

Business Lesson #2 from FEARLESS! The Musical . . .

“Yesterday Is Over”

     Song Title From: “FEARLESS The Golden Love Musical” ©2012 Valerie Connelly and Nightengale Media, LLC.

If you own, operate and/or manage a business

or professional practice of any kind,

consider this reminder a kick in the butt!

STOP talking and thinking about what’s more than a minute old. There are only two legitimate exceptions:

When your mind needs to stray for a few moments to take a pleasant relaxing reminiscent journey as a break in your stressful activities.

When you need to tap your memory banks for a quick assessment of what you once did or failed to do that will help an immediate circumstance.

If you’re dwelling on past events, you’re wasting your time, your energy and your money . . . and probably the time, energy and money of others as well.

Anything more than a clock-tick old

is in the past!

When you find your mind drifting into the past for anything other than to seek a relaxing, pleasant memory or to retrieve a decision-making bit of information, pinch yourself!

Zing your brain into accepting that what’s done is done. If something done calls for you to make amends, make amends. Then move on to the next minute.

Now that you’ve had your butt kicked, and you’ve pinched yourself, you have likely increased the odds of being able to focus more on the present. That’s a major step toward maximum emotional stability and good health.

The sign on my wall (since 1970!) says:

“Now is the

only time.

the past

is over;

the future

not yet here.”

And consider that the future, by the way, may never arrive . . . so the only healthy place for your brain and your body and your emotions —AND YOUR BUSINESS AND CAREER GROWTH— is right here, on each of these words, as you read them, here and now, in the present moment as much of the time as is possible each day because all the rest is fantasyland, and. . . because:

“Yesterday Is Over.”

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

Higher impact. Lower costs.

——————-

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Entrepreneurship & Expansion Coaching    931.854.0474

Go for your goals, thanks for your visit, God Bless You!

YOUR MEMORY CAN KILL YOU!

No, huh? Memory can kill? Of course it can!  STOP reading for a minute and recall your biggest life upset… go ahead, but just for a minute. That’s all you need to get the idea.

The more we dwell on past events and behaviors and thoughts, the deeper we dig into the world of neurosis, and the sicker emotionally and physically that we make ourselves.

Memories serve a couple of valuable purposes when they are used productively in the present moment.

• Recalling something pleasant can actually soothe the neurological system.
• Recalling a mistake can help us make a corrective adjustment to a current course of behavior or activity and help ensure greater odds for success going forward.

But when we get ourselves lost in our memory banks, even in the process of engaging positive past experiences, it’s as easy to slip out of the reality of the present moment as it is to take off a glove. The difference is that removing a glove has some conscious awareness attached. Focusing on a memory can easily suck us into a tunnel of no return.

You think this is not about you? Think again. All of us have an inherent instinct to recall past events, thoughts, actions, experiences a few times a day. Some of us are actually paid to do this and build careers around it: archaeologists, CPA s, historians, history teachers, researchers, scientists, therapists, and detectives all come to mind.

And doesn’t everyone fantasize about something that was once great and, conversely, about something that was once terrible?

So what do we do with all this awareness and how does it relate to entrepreneurial leadership?

What we need to do –to be maximally productive at work and in life– is to consciously use past memories as tools for enhancing present moments and for planning future events. And then STOP! When a memory goes beyond present-moment consciousness, it can cause accidents and illness. It’s just like worrying about the future! Both cause stress, actually: DIStress!

Okay, so now that we have that sitting on the table, what do we do to make our memories work for us instead of against us? And how can we help those we are responsible to for servicing with “leadership”?

• Work harder at staying focused and more tuned in to the present moment as much as possible.
• Keep our sights set on what is happening right now in front of us.

And your 5 best “Make Memories Work FOR You” Tools

1) Breathing Deeply (it need not be conspicuous!)

2) Exercising regularly (it need not be strenuous!)

3) Eating foods and food portions with genuine (vs. advertised) nutritional value

4) Sleeping enough to wake up feeling rested and alert

5) Anchoring your soul in a faith-based harbor!

Is that so hard? Well, if we choose for it to be hard, it certainly will be. But since all behavior is a choice, we can instead choose for it to be easy. Think like an entrepreneur about your SELF as well as about your ideas. Be innovative. Challenge. Rise to the occasion. These aren’t just guidelines for building businesses and professional practices. They’re guidelines for life!

Because without a solid foundation of being focused on the here-and-now present moment as much as possible, we will –like an abandoned enterprise– quickly become then-and-there.

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

Higher impact. Lower costs.

——————-

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Entrepreneurship & Expansion Coaching    931.854.0474

Go for your goals, thanks for your visit, God Bless You!

OPEN  MINDS  OPEN  DOORS

Make Today A Great Day For Someone!

If  PINKI-ELLAFONTAY

causes excessive bleeding,

liver or kidney disease, cancer,

congestive heart failure, death or

suicide, be sure to tell your doctor.

Are you kidding? Does anyone out there in pharmaceutical fairyland realize how utterly ridiculous they sound trying to bury imbecilic disclaimer utterances like this in the middle of fantasy advertising film footage of joyful, beach-skipping, pool-jumping, exhilarated couples and families and pets?

Do you overpaid ad agency wackos think the whole world is stupid?

Surely you jest? I mean who in their right mind is going to run out and buy (or request an Rx for) your moronic brand name medication after one-tenth of a second of thought about the purposefully misleading messages you dare to flood the airwaves with? That’s like promising a pink elephant!

In case you haven’t noticed, this is 2016. We are far beyond such childish displays of intentionally deceptive, insulting, brain-wasting messages.

And your market research people are wrong. No one rushes to their pharmacy or doctor (or undertaker) requesting your stupid-named, stupidly-advertised, wildly over-priced brand because they identify with the actors and actresses and phony scripts in phony settings set to jubilant music with schmaltzy-voice over announcers rattling out disclaimer warnings like they were available ice cream toppings.

Let’s get rid of this nonsense in favor of reality and straightforward educational presentations. How about messages that reach out and grab?

Sorry, but I really don’t need to see animated intestines dancing on my TV screen accompanied by threats of death from constipation or diarrhea to appreciate the plights of those who suffer such inhumane ailments.

How refreshing would it be, instead, to see and hear advertising that teaches how to carefully question (and carefully listen to the answers provided by) my healthcare professionals?

It really IS time for pharma businesses to start acting and talking like responsible adults with more concern for the well-being of human beings than for lining their pockets with astronomically disproportionate salaries and for covering their butts with thinly disguised legal jargon . . . just in case their great products should fail. And don’t blame the government. We all know they are clueless. EXPLAIN government-mandated disclaimers. Don’t bury them.

Stop the foolishness. Speak the truth. Teach us. Show us. Educate us. Be specific, don’t gloss over. Use honest true facts, not make-believe charts and misleading visuals. Be the kinds of teachers you’d like to see your children have. INTEGRITY is the word! Now would you like to know how I REALLY feel? 😉

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

Higher impact. Lower costs.

——————-

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Entrepreneurship & Expansion Coaching    931.854.0474

Go for your goals, thanks for your visit, God Bless You!

OPEN  MINDS  OPEN  DOORS

Make Today A Great Day For Someone!

        I just re-discovered a Christmas ornament my 14-year-old grand- daughter Gwyn made . . . five years ago. The brightly painted piece of heart-shaped plywood is the stage for her blobby-marker-printed starstruck words. But where did you get those words? I asked. “I just thought them up in my head,”  she said.

HER WORDS ARE THE BEST WISDOM I CAN SHARE FOR 2016:

Life is a question. No person on earth is your enemy but you. You can’t decide what you’re born with, but you can decide how you end up.

Being happy is beyond a feeling. It’s a way of life.

Questions are endless but the only one answer is YOU.

You can dream without imagination, but you can’t dream without a belief.

You are who you are, and no one can stop you.

— Gwyn, Age 9

As you head into 2016 building your life and your business, do Gwyn’s words have as much “start the new year” clout for you?

Please let me know YOUR thoughts . . .

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God Bless You One And All . . .

and HAPPY NEW YEAR To You!

 # # #

Watch where you’re going,

Are You Reacting

. . . or Responding?

When you make it a habit to choose to respond to problem people and problem situations instead of choosing to react, guess what happens?

• You eliminate all possibility of ever over-reacting, and that’s a good thing if you own, operate, or manage a business of any kind.
• It’s also a good thing if you are working your way up the career ladder or committed to creating an aura of professionalism, of peace and calm around your personal and work relationships, your friendships, your family.
• It even increases your odds of preventing accidents, in addition to enhancing your personal performance, and overall health.

Unless you’re in an emergency situation, a calm and thoughtful response solves more problems more effectively than a frazzled or angry reaction. And you already know that choosing calm and thoughtful over frazzled and angry also helps ensure better and longer-lasting health.

Stop reading this right now, and close your eyes while you take a deep breath or two, and pay particular attention to the fact that it slows your heartbeat, helps you collect your thoughts, and increase your sense of self-control.

Go ahead. Treat yourself for ten or fifteen or thirty seconds. You might surprise yourself. Go on; I’ll wait.

So now that you’ve jetted your self down a notch, do you feel or think any differently than you did ten sentences ago? Three or four breaths ago? And what does this post make you think about for yourself that you’ve either not been aware of before, or that you have gotten lazy about?

As today’s world swirls, it’s easy to simply forget how important the distinction is between reacting and responding and how rewarding it can be for you to take more deep breaths more often.

The bottom line? Your behavior –your words and actions– is always your choice. Your choice may not always be a conscious one and it could be one that’s the result of a choice you made long ago that’s come full circle to stir up your anxieties. But recognize it for what it is . . . you can choose to make things easy on yourself, or you can choose to make them hard on yourself. Why would you want to choose unproductive upset over productive calm? And, yes, you can choose courage!

More conscious choices come from more conscious awareness. There are many mental and physical tools available to trigger responsive choices. Deep breathing is one of these. Yoga is another. Regular exercise, visualization (imagining/projecting/”seeing yourself” achieve a task or solve a problem before actually responding), are two others. Having goals that are specific, realistic, flexible, due-dated, and in writing can also help you steer yourself in high productivity directions.

Don’t just think about all this. Try it!

Keep your head cool and your feet warm

# # #

hal@businessworks.US

STRATEGY/ CONTENT/ CONNECTION

Higher impact. Lower costs.

——————-

Business Development/ National-Awards/ Record Client Sales

Entrepreneurship & Expansion Coaching    931.854.0474

Go for your goals, thanks for your visit, God Bless You!

OPEN  MINDS  OPEN  DOORS

Make Today A Great Day For Someone!