Put this on your wall…

     Effective communication is commonly attributed 80% to listening and 20% to speaking. Experts report that as much as 87% of communication is nonverbal. So where does that leave us, besides all tangled up with sign language?

     Martin Yates, in his best-selling, well-on-the-way-to-becoming-a-classic business book (KEEPING THE BEST…And Other Thoughts On Building A Super Competitive Workforce; published 1991 by Bob Adams, Inc., Holbrook, MA) says essentially–among many other A-1 working management concepts–that your effectiveness as a communicator is as heavily dependent on the follow-up actions you take, as it is on what you say and don’t say, and how you move or don’t move.

     Yates advises, for example, that after soliciting input, the boss needs to “make a visible effort to act on it and credit its source. It is counterproductive,” he says, “to solicit good input from team members, then put it into action with no accredidation (or worse still, with incorrect accreditation).”

     Yates proceeds to suggest (to owners/operators/managers) to praise creative ideas whenever they surface. This, he says, “encourages innovation and success-oriented thinking.” Yates paraphrases the old standby message to praise in public; criticize (when it’s absolutely necessary) in private.

     His emphasis on “accentuating the positive” [See also my Prentice-Hall Action Report article, “Theory A” (for “Attitude”)  published a decade earlier on the same topic] “build(s) positive behavior. It cannot be repeated enough: whatever behavior you recognize [positive, negative or ambivalent] will be reinforced” [and will produce more of the same]!

     So, the bottom line here is that if you are managing others and not getting what you want out of them, you must look first to your self. Ask yourself if you are paying more attention to scolding, belittling, and taking people to task than you are focusing on searching out the good behaviors and publicly rewarding those?

     I know a highly skilled healthcare practitioner and prominent researcher who maintains a “Wall of Shame” where he posts representations of every manner of employee screw-up, from dumb memos and emails to photos of his people caught in embarassing moments or doing the wrong things with patients. He laughs about it, and says his people all laugh at it too, that it’s become a “company culture kind of joke.”  

     Well guess what? The wall that started with 2-3 isolated pieces of incriminating paper is now covered with the evidence of a steady stream of bad behavior. And not only does that “company culture wall” speak for itself, so to speak, but so does this organization’s employee rate of turnover.

     People leave there–rapidly and happily–for lower paying jobs. Is he successful? His research is successful. As a businessman, and a professional, he’s earning just a small fraction of his potential… because his reputation for emphasizing the negative now precedes him.

     It’s a much easier, more enjoyable, and more productive thing to reward positive behavior than negative, and if you don’t agree, I’ll print out your comments and paste them on my wall!     

God Bless You and Good Night!  halalpiar  

Special thanks to my friend Doyle Slayton www.salesblogcast.com for the indirect inspiration   

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Happy St. Patrick‘s Day!

What happens for you on this day every year? Do you get up and put on green clothes? Pig out on corned beef and cabbage? (This “traditional” meal is an Americanism, by the way. Like pizza not coming from Italy, the Irish eat spareribs and sauerkraut on St. Patrick’s Day!)

     Maybe you eat green bagels (ah, many of these in New York, but positively not an Irish thing!) Can you even find a florist with any green carnations left? Do you get smashed on green beer and end up with a hangover on March 18th?

Or is today just a day like any other?

     Y’know what? I think that if you think this day is just like any other, you have a problem needs fixin’ because what you’re really saying is that everyday is just like every other one, that nothing much changes and that nothing much is special, except maybe Fridays at 5pm and your birthday, right?

     Well, hopefully this isn’t you we’re talking about, but maybe you know someone who fits that description? And if you do, maybe wish her or him Happy Birthday more often!

     The secret of a prosperous business is to practice the secret of a prosperous life. The trouble is that practically no people get this until they achieve AARP status. The secret, after all, of a prosperous life only comes with the hindsight and wisdom of age and the kinds of genuine appreciation and gratefulness that only come from deep, deep inside.

     To me, it’s a lot like learning the positive and productive life changes that come from discovering the simplicity, value, consciousness and energy flow that come from deep breathing.

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Click this link for a free, 60-second, 4-step “how to” that can change your life. No sales pitch. No gimmicks. Just a valuable “how to” that you’re likely to wish you’d learned long ago!       

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     What can we do to come to realizations like this sooner in life? Maybe nothing. Maybe we just need to be grateful to have finally grabbed the brass ring (whoops! showing my merry-go-round age again!). and we should just take it and run!

     Well, breathing and running can get us nowhere if we’re living on a treadmill and afraid to step off. Breathing and running won’t take us where we want to go if we don’t believe in ourselves. and believe that we have the ability to get there, wherever “there” is for each of us.      

The point is that EVERY day –St. Patrick’s Day and the day after St. Patrick’s Day included— is a new opportunity to be the best that we can be, to do the best that we can do!

It’s a new opportunity to move another step closer to the “there” that we want to get to, the “difference” we want to make.

     Making your life happen the way that you want it to happen is 100% in your mind. It is your CHOICE! When you find your brain falling out and weakening and upset feelings coming in, STOP! Take a deep breath, focus your mind on where you are and what you want and start going there.

     Dump the upset baggage and go forward. Make today and tomorrow and the next day, and the next, EACH the special day that you deserve to have. Choose it! Use it! STOP with the excuses! Do it!

God Bless You and

Happy St. Patrick’s Day

EVERY DAY! 

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Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

Survey this, doubters!

(GRATEFULNESS, LIKE FLATTERY,

WILL GET YOU EVERYWHERE) 

I know there’re places in Maine with 9-10 feet of snow. But they know how to deal with it up there. Here, the “near blizzard conditions” that dumped 4-6 inches of immobilizing snow on America’s second biggest peninsula (unless you count Florida as a peninsula, which I suppose…) has given me cabin fever. And when you read the results of some of my phone calls this week, you may think I’ve gone completely off the deep end. But here goes: my unofficial telephone survey shows —

     9 out of 10 business owners from 9 different industries in 6 different states who I’ve spoken with in the last three days (including one with 50 locations, and another with 400 employees, and yet another with three employees) have ALL said the most important thing about the bad economy is that it has made them “grateful” for what they have. 

     All 10? Yup, all 10. They all said the word, “grateful”? Yup, all 10. In fact, in each discussion, gratefulness was underscored as a dominent factor in keeping business growth steady while neighboring businesses were crumbling.

     Hard to believe, right? I thought so too, but the more I probed, the more that I was reassured of the importance of being eternally appreciative on a day-to-day basis as a leading factor in keeping associate, employee, vendor, and customer attitudes positive. And positive attitudes beget positive business!

     “When I look around me at other companies in our industry, I’m really grateful to be where we are right now,” is the kind of comment I heard over and over. “I’m grateful to have such loyal people working for me!” and “We’re grateful to our customers that they trust and support us during these tough times,” and “I can’t tell you how grateful we are to the bankers in this town who have stood shoulder-to-shoulder with us and are helping us to get through this recession.”

     SO, take a good hard look at yourself. Go ahead. Go to the bathroom mirror if you need to; lock the door if you need to. Look yourself in the eye. Have you been appreciating what you have? Can you act, think and talk more grateful?

     Maybe you can’t relate to the millions of people without food or clothes or a roof or healthcare because they’re not in your neighborhood, or on your street, or in your back yard . . . because the success you’ve had has served to insulate you from the anguish, poverty, hunger, and ill health.

     But it’s out there, and you need to be grateful that you are not. You need to be grateful that you have managed to be in the right places at the right times and have kept your life and your business on track. It didn’t happen by itself. It didn’t happen by chance.

     It happened because you built a reputation for trust and integrity by demonstrating trust and integrity. Be grateful you had the good sense and judgement and abilities to follow that path.          

     Appreciate who you are and what you have. Appreciate your self!                    halalpiar

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“We should enjoy here

while we’re here,

’cause there’s no here there!”

                                                                                      –ZIGGY

     Okay, all you entrepreneurs, don’t start with the excuses that you have no time for time management. That’s a choice. You know as well as I do that you need to MAKE the choice and TAKE the time to do a few things besides business, and that this is as good a day as ever to give it a go!

     Yes, it really is true that you need to take time out to eat. Maybe you thought that candy stash in your desk drawer would get you through the day, or that your idea of good nutrition and getting your daily “greens” meant the pickle on a Big Mac or the fried green pepper with the sausage sandwich, but guess what?

     So that little kick in the butt reminded you to eat something that’s actually good for you. Good. Next, let’s look at how else you spend your business-steamrollering 24 hours (besides the 4-7 hours sleep). No, YOU look. I don’t really want to know. Take 20 seconds out to look at how you’re allocating those 17-20 hours each day. If it’s all work and . . . you know the rest.

     I just want that you should open your mind to open some doors by building in at least two or three of the following seven activities every day to supplement your focus on the thought that you need to take time to WORK because it is the price of success.

     Why should these other seven activities matter? Because too often (besides WORK) ill health and broken families become the price of success. So here . . . seven focused activities that those most successful businesspeople of good health and strong families routinely include in daily existences:

1. Take time to THINK; it is the source of power.
2. Take time to PLAY; it is the secret of perpetual youth.
3. Take time to READ; it is the foundation of wisdom.
4. Take time to WORSHIP; it is the highway to reverence.
5. Take time to BE FRIENDLY; it is the road to happiness.
6. Take time to LAUGH; it is the music of the soul.
7. Take time to DREAM; it is hitching your wagon to a star.

. . . and, the bottom line: CHOOSE to take time to live!  Or as cartoon character Ziggy once said:

“We should enjoy here while we’re here,

’cause there’s no here there!”

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What are you waiting for?

“Annnnny-daaay, noow . . .”

The once famous bank commercial mocking out competitors for their loan waiting times seemed appropriate. How much time did you spend waiting today? How much of that time was a total waste? 

WE WAIT AT, AND IN: lines, offices, reception rooms, hallways, cars, trucks, construction sites, showrooms, restaurants, parks, parking lots, airports, taxi stands, bars, elevators, boardrooms, alcoves, bathrooms, meetings, conference rooms, the water cooler, fax and copy machines, roach coach, training centers, message centers, traffic, bridges, trains, busses, hospitals, airplanes, taxi’s, garages, food lines, courtrooms, examination rooms, visitation rooms, toll booths, ticket counters, lobbies, check-out counters, subway stations, ferries, zoos, concerts, planetariums, sporting events, banks, drive-in pharmacies and fastfood windows, doorways, road construction lanes, and 487,000 others.

AND WE WAIT FOR: bosses, clients, doctors, lawyers, co-workers, underlings, salespeople, associates, lunch dates, online connections, conference calls, on-hold, dinner dates, traffic, bridges, trains, busses, airplanes, taxi’s, breakfast dates, coffee breaks, lunch whistles, clocks, scheduled events, calendar pages, waiters and waitresses, deliveries, contractors, news, alarms, prisoners, bankers, seminars, meetings, accountants, patients, families, friends, people who beat us to the bathroom, and 269,000 others.

AND WHILE WE WAIT, WE SUFFER FROM:

• ANTICIPATION.
• ANXIETY.
• WORRY.
• ANGER.
• EMBARASSMENT.
• EXPECTATIONS.
• DISAPPOINTMENT.
• STRESS.
• INSULT: BEING “STOOD UP” OR FORGOTTEN.

     And what do you DO when you’re thrown into that jungle described above? What did you do today in delay? And don’t try to excuse yourself with some haste makes waste explanation because I know that you know that each of the bullet items above is a CHOICE! The only thing that makes waste is waste. Waiting time is valuable.

     HOW ABOUT CHOOSING FOR THE WAITING TIME TO BE HAPPY AND PRODUCTIVE TIME, AND USE IT TO: Write? Take notes? Take pictures? (I met a guy created a complete photo essay while standing on line at the post office, and actually published it!) Text Message? Make phone calls? Plan? Follow-up? Research? Read? Make contacts? Make contracts? Network? Study?

     Can you, in other words, do something more constructive with your valuable time here on earth than to stare like a zombie at some waiting room TV tuned to some negative news network? Just because you have to wait, doesn’t mean you sacrifice your humanity for sheepdom.

     Always carry pen and paper and/or laptop and/or tape recorder and/or camera and/or a book you’re reading and/or a cell phone and/or some luggage to put all that stuff in . . . and don’t forget the umbrella and parachute . . . hey, ya never know! 

     Some action, remember, is always better than no action . . . unless “action” to you means smoking, drinking booze, eating candy bars, snorting or shooting up drugs, punching/biting/kicking, stabbing, shooting, or bank robbery.  

     And you may think, like the song, that “My time is your time,” but it’s not! Because you only ever have NO time or LOTSA time, or ANYtime, or SOMEtime, or have been having a HIGH time for a LONG time. Oh, right, there’s America’s PASTtime, which is a great way to PASS time in the SUMMERtime or SPRINGtime, but seldom in the WINTERtime.

     If all that’s not enough for you, remember that “Time and tide wait for no man.” (No mention of women in that philosophy so it must be because women have “THAT” time), and then there’s “He who hesitates is lost” (which most men are!). Okay? Okay. Later.  halalpiar     

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HERE’S YOUR CHOICE…

___YES, before I do Hal’s (free) 60-second, 4-step

stress solution, I want to read a little bit about stress!

Okay, skip over the NO choice below and the link line under that, and read a little bit first. Then you can come back up to the link anytime you like as you absorb all these great stress factoids that follow. 

___NO, I’m wired and I don’t want to read anything. Just 

   give me Hal’s (free) immediate 60-second magic NOW! 

Okay, here you go.  You get it right here on this site by simply clicking www.halalpiar.com/?page_id=35  When it works for you, please send others here for a dose –friends, family, associates, neighbors, lovers, enemies– anyone who you would like to see be more relaxed and have better control of themselves and their lives. And of course please come back and visit again soon.

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     STRESS does not come from outside you. It is something you produce inside your body by the way you choose to react or respond to people, places, events, behaviors, and things (like a difficult person, an unpleasant environment, a boss’s frown, a car that won’t start, or an overdue bill).

     STRESS is positive as well as negative. STRESS is necessary for getting out of bed in the morning and for doing the tasks we do every day…even for reading this sentence right now! But too much stress becomes physically, mentally, and emotionally unhealthy. It is the most serious drain of human productivity in our lifetime.

     EACH OF US experiences OVERstress in different ways. Some get headaches. Some get stomachaches. “knots” or “butterflies”. Some get back pain…tightness of the neck and shoulders, legs or chest. Some eat too much. Some drink too much alcohol. Some smoke too much. Many get high blood pressure. Most who get high blood pressure also get other ailments, diseases, emotional disorders, or set themselves up for accidents and, all too often, heart problems.

     MOST OF THE BREATHS we tend to take most of the time are too shallow. If you can breathe more deeply and more often every day, you will think more clearly, perform more confidently, feel more relaxed and be assured of achieving maximum productivity more often. You will be healthier. You will be more in control of your feelings, your actions, your circumstances.

     YOU WILL BE more of the person that you’re capable of being that you’ve always wanted to be (and be happier at it)! Pretty good stuff, huh? It truly is. So, now, go back to the top of this post and click on the link and get started NOW making stress work FOR you!    halalpiar

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Okay, workout freaks, listen up!

     Lifting every day for 3 hours a day is sick.  Running 5-10 miles a day every day is sick. 

     And those are just for openers on the physical front.  Mental and emotional compulsions are just as bad.  

[First of all, if you are one of these maniacal types, you’ve already clicked off to some body-building or aerobics site by now anyway, so –we should be down to those who have just been thinking about, or considering, doing all that lifting or running or whatever other form of exercise that occupies equal blocks of time, effort and attention.  And that’s a good thing because –for you– there is still hope!]

     For openers, you should know that I don’t hate exercise.  I play softball (mostly second base) 2-3 times a week, all year long.  I do stretching and isometric exercises for an hour every day, seven days a week.  I walk two dogs every morning and every night (well, okay, night walks are quickies) and I hustle up and down 16 stairs 7-10 times a day, more on weekends. 

     I used to run 5-10 miles every day – rain, snow, ice, heat – 365 days a year for ten years, so I know from compulsion.  Yes, back problems from road running eventually forced me to the 3 S’s (softball, stairs and stretching).

     Here’s the thing: When you exercise ANYthing (your body, your mind, your emotions) on a compulsive basis, where you get the guilties for missing one day, you are functioning in such an overdrive mode that you are throwing your body, mind, and emotions out of whack! 

     You are creating discord, stress, and imbalance for yourself. 

     You cannot function as a whole person when part of you

commandeers the rest of you. 

     How out of touch with reality are many world-class athletes?  Do you really think they live happy lives?  How out of control is your work ethic if you are consumed by fitting in your three-hour workout every day?  What kind of social life can that possibly leave you? 

     What is the push all about?  What exactly are you trying to prove?  To whom?  Don’t you think it’s worth exploring ways to live a more well-rounded existence?  Where do you think compulsive exercise behaviors will take you in life?  Is that really where you want to go? 

     If you own or manage your own business, or think of yourself as an entrepreneur, you need to maintain health and fitness but find other outlets for yourself.  The world’s greatest authorities on fitness all agree that three serious 20-minute workouts (even brisk walks) a week should be enough for most anyone to maintain good health and fitness levels. 

     I don’t pretend to be a fitness expert or to suggest what is best for you, but I will tell you that –for me– regular exercise in moderation keeps me happier and healthier and more in touch with myself, and sharper in business than I ever experienced through my ten years of compulsive running.  halalpiar

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Others are not living

in your shoes…

     When your business is struggling is not the time to be joining hands with other struggling businesses.  It’s time to bail out and back off all your good-intention, admirable community do-gooder projects before they end up flushing you down the tubes and out of existence.  There comes a time when you need to muster your forces to be able to come from a position of strength.

     Clinging to involvements with borderline business value when your business is suffering, for example, simply because they’ve gained you a reliable, responsible reputation in your town or county –and you’re reluctant to let anyone down who’s counting on you– is just plain stupid!  

     The local chamber of commerce and Rotary Club and Kiwanis and Little League managed just fine before you got involved and they will survive economic downturn times because someone will always run to the rescue.  But, if your business is sliding rapidly downhill, and you’re starting to worry about upcoming meals, get off the public service merry-go-round and tend to your own needs until you are back on your feet. 

Is what I am doing this very minute

leading me to where I need and want to go?

. . . is the first question you must ask yourself. 

And, once I get to where I need and want to go, will I then be in a better position to contribute even more time, money, and effort to achieving the community goals that my present pursuits alone are draining from me and my business?

. . . is the second question to answer.

     Don’t be worried about what others will think.  Others are not living in your shoes.  Others are always quick to drain your resources when they don’t want to contribute their own.  No one will fault you for doing what you have to do to survive. 

     And in this economy, you need not feel ashamed or embarassed.  Instead, feel smart that you are taking proactive steps to make yourself better and put youself in a position to be able to contribute more to your community.  Others will be much happier to see you return a year down the road and come roaring back into the organization running on all cylinders. 

     Tuck in your tail.  Realize that the best thing you can do to help others is to help yourself first so you can be in a position of strength to reach out to those who need it, instead of offering your hand while you are standing on thin ice yourself.  Take a sabbatical and work to restore the solidity of your business foundation.     halalpiar

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Do You LOVE

What You Do

For A Living?

     If you do, you are a rarity!  [Maybe you could sell yourself on E-Bay?]  And if in fact you DO love what you do for a living, then you’re likely to also be exceptionally good at doing what you do.

     But (and be truthful with yourself here) if you really don’t love what you do (and endless studies indicate that this constitutes the vast majority), then the odds are overwhelmingly that you’re not particularly good at doing what you do.  Similarly endless studies also say that we perform best when we enjoy what we’re doing! 

     So, if that’s the case, and you’re just muddling your way through your job or career, and not making waves, in order to keep food on the table and tunes on your ipod, you need to do two things: 1) Keep your day job, and 2) Get off your butt and pursue work that you’ll enjoy doing. 

     FYI, 1) and 2) above are based on the fact widely known but little followed fact of life that it’s easier to find a job when you’re already employed than it is when you’re not.  

     Now, if you are one of those oddball types that is extraordinarily good at job performance for a job or career that you hate, you need to make sure you’re sitting before you read the rest of this. 

     In a chair?  Okay, here’s the scoop: There may be dozens (hundreds, even) of reasons that you are performing well at what you hate, but none of them changes the fact that you need to work yourself out from under. 

     Why?  Because every minute of every day, you (your mind, your emotions and your physical body) are experiencing negative stress decay.

     Negative stress takes its toll.  Eventually it finds it’s way into your overall mental, physical and emotional health and well-being.  You may altready be well on the way there.  But, don’t let that depress you.  Not doing anything about it is what’s depressing!

     Like having your lungs miraculously return to healthy pink just a short time after you stop smoking, your mind, emotions and physical health can likewise begin to recover and surge and thrive as soon as you start to change your over-stressed lifestyle! 

     Remember that this kind of lifestyle/behavioral change is your choice.  And you can choose to make it hard or easy.  If you make it easy, you can take it easy.  Happiness breeds productivity and self-worth.  Take a couple of deep breaths and do it, or pass this post along to someone you care about!

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COMIN’ OUT!

 

                                                

No, it’s not a reference to a specific type of celebration party, or to an at-long-last exit from one’s closet.  COMIN’  OUT! is a cry you can hear in almost every town across America every summer on every baseball and softball field! 

It’s the BP (batting practice) pitcher yelling to all those in the field to be alert and pay attention and don’t turn your back on the ball because the batting practice pitches are about to commence and the batting practice hitters will be trying to hit the batting practice pitches down the batting practice fielders’ throats!   

When an irate customer, business client or partner, patient or associate decides to throw a tantrum (or toss out a bombardment of accusations, half-truths or outright lies . . . in person or via email), don’t turn your back on the ball; it could hit you in the back of your head! 

Regardless of the indignant individual’s motivation to exercise pent up frustrations, flex political muscle, show off, play one upmanship or activate a superiority (or inferiority) complex, don’t waste time being analytical . . . and PLEASE:  don’t react!  Think respond, not react!  If you don’t react, you can never over-react!  The old saying still rings true that it takes two to tango! 

If you’ve mentally and emotionally prepared yourself in advance for such an eventuality, you won’t have to get your glove and get in the game; you’ll already be there! 

It’s easier than it might seem.  (Remember, since every behavior is a choice —yes, it is!— you can CHOOSE for it to be easy or, if you have masochistic tendencies, then go ahead and CHOOSE for it to be hard!) 

Simply imagine you’re in the field, glove in hand, and the pitcher yells over her or his shoulder, COMIN’ OUT!  Then turn to face the ball and get ready to catch it, even if it appears to be heading somewhere else.  Why?  It never hurts to be ready.  Be, as any good Boy Scout will tell you, prepared!  (I didn’t say “neurotic,” mind you, just “prepared.”)

For openers, most human beings caught off-guard by COMIN’ OUT! circumstances can benefit by taking a couple of deep breaths(to circulate oxygen and make the brain more alert, and to circulate blood flow and make the muscles more relaxed), which serves to pull the fuse out of the tendency to react! 

For closers, be persistently objective and unemotional in responding [The Adult ego-state in Transactional Analysis].  Attempt to get the whiner/complainer/bitcher/screamer/fist-pounder person to   s  l  o  w     d  o  w  n  and deal with each issue on a one-at-a-time basis.  Upset people tend to bunch together an avalanche of problems and issues, none of which can of course be addressed or resolved, buried under so many others. 

No guarantees with any of this except that —for sure— you will handle COMIN’ OUT! situations better having thought about best practice responses than you ever would with your back to home plate!

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www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson]

Make today a GREAT day for someone!