Dear Doctor . . .

Everyone who deals with

you –personally or  

professionally– already

KNOWS you’re a doctor.

Dear Doctor, On behalf of all those people who visit and speak with you, and who deal with you on a personal and/or business level –but who think they need to choose to be intimidated by you– please do all of them (and your professional self, and of course your healthcare practice) a really big favor:

Acknowledge, and act, and speak the truth.

Be a real person.

Don’t cast your title to the wind. You’ve worked hard for it. You’ve earned it. It’s something to be proud of. But you know what? Healthcare is serious enough. Lighten up a little and watch what happens!

Step down from the pedestal that those who surround you all day put you on (“Yes, Doctor”; “No, Doctor”; “Whatever you say, Doctor”). As you communicate with businesspeople, remember that –not very unlike many of them—  you are a regular person with special knowledge and special skills.

Those attributes do not make you a special person. This is not a come-uppance rant. This is reality. I have had the privilege of working personally with nearly 2,000 doctors in the last 30 years as a practice development consultant and as a personal and professional counselor. Here are some things I learned:

Doctors are bred to have their heads in the clouds. That they are all people who excel academically is not in dispute. That doctors who wallow in their achievements is not only distasteful to others, it also serves to undermine healthcare practice success by pulling the rug out from under the mainstays of patient and referrer loyalty.

Only you, dear doctor, can make yourself a special person by the ways that you communicate with your patients and their families, your office and professional staff, detail reps, practice development people, consultants, staff trainers, equipment and e-system suppliers, hospital personnel and affiliate operatives, insurance providers, local media people, and the communities you serve . . . oh, and perhaps the hardest of all entities: other doctors.

When a doctor is called “doctor,” it is more out of habit and fear than out of respect. Doctors who gain the most respect are those who introduce themselves by their first names. Many people unconsciously process the ways they size up doctors who flaunt their titles as being insecure, self-indulgent, and insensitive.

Well, yes, doctor, you do make a point: it is true that you deal with human lives and with issues involving physical, mental, and emotional well-being and so need to separate yourself as a professional in the patient’s eyes.

But you also know as well as anyone that the less stressed a patient and family tend to be, the quicker the path to healing and recovery. Titles are pompous and unnecessary barricades to free-flowing communications. Anything that short-circuits communications flow can create stress and anxiety, and misunderstandings..

Excel instead at the ways you present yourself and your ideas and findings and suggestions and recommendations. Excel at “bedside manners.” Excel at how you present yourself to the outside world, to how you are (forgive the crassness) “packaged.”

Find people who are as professionally skilled at marketing and writing and persuading as you are at medicine.

Straight from the shoulder: Do NOT rely on the ideas or execution of ideas put forth by loving, well-intrentioned spouses or office managers or in-laws, or parents, children, med-school classmates, your neighbor’s 17-year-old computer whiz or some SEO “expert” who jumped into your Facebook page.

DOCTORS: Want some free tips? Seeking help fining respectful experts? Proven practice development steps? Call or email me and let’s chat. No fees for getting acquainted.

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  Hal@Businessworks.US 

  Open Minds Open Doors 

 Thanks for your visit and God Bless You.

  Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Welcome, and thank you

for joining me on this

personal milestone of

  1,000 posts at this site.

Before I take you on my quick-read path of lessons learned, which I unabashedly believe includes something of value for everyone, let me offer up my heartfelt appreciation for the first 400 visits I had in April of 2008 when I started, and the millions of visitors who followed over the last 3+ years.

~~~~~~~~~~

Please continue your visits, comments, and free RSS Feed subscriptions.

And please note that this blog will now publish new

posts 5 days a week, every Sunday through Thursday.

But the Search Window is always open, and content is always relevant.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you

for your confidence,

trust and loyal support.

Special thanks to Kathy — the wind beneath my wings for 25 years, and to the wonderful dogs we’ve been blessed with, who surrounded my feet as I posted each night — our Black Cocker (“Tuckerton“) who left us last year at 6 years old and our Golden Retriever (“Barnegat“) who lived six months longer than him; she was 13 . . . and our new one-year-old-this-week Cavachon (“Breezy“).

For the endless stream of writing encouragement and feedback (regardless of agreement or disagreement with my representations, and there’s been plenty of both!), please indulge me long enough to use this space for special thanks to my: son, Christopher; daughter Haley; oldest granddaughter, Talley; brother-in-law Tim; mother-in-law, Marian; brother, Rick. And: my Aunt Dorothy and sister-in-law Claire; Melanie Adair, Angela Current, Doyle Slayton, Jonena Realth, Dr. Ian Fries, George Kanuck, Kevin Bousquet, Meredith Bell, Jeff Banning, Danielle-Dixon-Moyle, Peter Leeds, Jim Haines, Dr. Jeffrey Alpern, Michael Infusino, Ken and Sara Kraft, Bruce Burchell, Andrew Jackson; Jim Oliviero, Ken Poppele, Andy Larrimore, Laura Pritchett, Jeff Shactman, Barrie Proctor, Brian Smith, Dennis Forney, my friends, neighbors, Twitter and LinkedIn followers, former students, past and present clients, three special friends lost this past year: Butch Taras, Paul Harp and Ernst Dannemann, and my 150 softball league buddies in Delaware and New Jersey, and their families.

Thank you also to the young men and women of America’s military service whose devotion and courage make the freedom possible that allows me to choose to write, and to be able to write freely.

. . . and thank you, God!

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is some of what I learned that you may find helpful to be reminded of . . . to think about . . . to try, apply, expand, adjust, enjoy, and to just pick up and run with:

1)  Never assume that no one (or that no one who matters) is “out there.”

When you write and post something on the Internet, someone, somewhere, is always reading what you write . . . every thing you write! So make it count.

2)  Be gracious with your insults.

Criticize the behavior –words and actions– not the person! When you feel you must take someone’s behavior to task, take it to task, but try to “sleep on” what you write before you click Publish.

3)  Take lots of deep breaths. 

More frequent deep breathing will channel stress productively, to stay in control, to be focused on the “here-and-now” present as much as possible, to ensure that you respond instead of react. Remember, if you don’t react, you can never over-react!

4)  Be kinder than necessary

 EVERYone you meet and re-meet every day is fighting some kind of battle.

5)  “A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes.”

(Thank you Mark Twain) 

6)  “The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter–’tis the difference between the lightning-bug and the lightning.”  

(Thank you again Mark Twain)

7)  “Time waits for no one. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.”

 (Thank you B. Olatunji)

8)  Ask yourself the following 4 questions:

 Why?  Why Not?  Why Not Me?  Why Not Now? A few times a day is not a bad idea.

9)  Accept the fact that the news media no longer “reports” anything.

Literally every story breaks down into some stress-filled level of disguised political opinion. If you think that’s exaggeration, try testing your willpower to not watch or listen to or read any news or news-related presentations of any kind for just one week, then see and feel the results. You will be happier, healthier, less-stressed, more productive, and making a bigger difference in the world, especially if you combine this effort with #3 above. (3 weeks of it, by the way, will literally transform your life!)

10)  “To Thine Own Self Be True!”  

                                         (Authenticity + Passion = Success)

(Thank you, Shakespeare)

   11)  “There is a time for everything under heaven.”

(Thank you, God)

   12)  “Open Minds Open Doors.”

(Thank you United Technologies)

   13)  “The journey to discovery consists not in having new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

(Thank you Proust)

    14)  “The only thing that’s permanent is change.”

(Thank you Greek philosopher Hericlitus, 2500 years ago)

    15)  “Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”

(Thank you Alfred Souza)

    16)  Great blog posts only happen because of great blog followers.

If you like what I write, thank your self because I write it only for you, and only with your input. I am grateful for your every visit.

Have a wonderful week ahead, filled with everything you want.

Best regards – Hal

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 Open minds open doors

 Thanks for visiting.     God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone

How can you ever get where

you’re going if you don’t 

know where you’ve been?

You’ve heard me a zillion times about the importance of focusing on the “here-and-now” present moment if you seek success in any form — and it’s a particularly embracable idea if you’re a leader, a small business or professional practice owner or manager, an entrepreneur, a parent, teacher, in military or community service, or unemployed.

I’ve belabored the point that dwelling on or in the past, and worrying about the future, are mentally, emotionally, and physically unhealthy places to be. They are fantasyland locations and are at the core of neurosis.

 BUT when you can make use of the past or future from a present-moment mindset, so that you control past and future thoughts . . .

You Win! Don’t believe it? Follow this:

• Think for a minute, from your present-moment level of awareness, about where you’ve been in life (not  on a map, but where your thought patterns, performance levels, relationships, and business experiences have been). When you think about those things, what value do you give them in the here-and-now? 

• Are these experiences that led you to where you are? So reaching back into them, which ones yield you the greatest value in the present? Which can most dramatically, most effectively, launch you into the future? Where exactly do you want to go in life? What in your past can most help you get there?

• What roadblocks have you chosen to put between past learning experiences and future plans? What are the 3 most important steps you can take right now to start getting over or around those roadblocks? What excuses are you choosing to use to keep yourself from taking the most important of those 3 steps?

• Take some deep breaths and mentally stand back from yourself, in a vacuum, without feeling past guilt or future worry, and describe you as you imagine yourself to be 10 years from today, August 3, 2021. What would you tell you to do NOW to get yourself on a more productive, happier, healthier, more rewarding path?

• Go ahead, tell yourself –maybe in a mirror? Take some more deep breaths. Imagine, see yourself as the person you most want to become. Try to visualize your physical appearance (clothes, jewelry, skin, hair, teeth, brightness of eyes) and your attitude (how you walk, talk, carry yourself).

• You have the ability to choose now, today, tonight, this hour, this minute to start on the path that will take you where you want to be. And this moment in time will be your past when you achieve that new goal for yourself. Will you look back to it then and commend your decision to move forward or wallow in self-misery for not choosing?

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Hal@Businessworks.US 302.933.0116 

 Open minds open doors

 Thanks for visiting.     God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone

Are you on drugs?

Is someone in your family?

Someone who

works with you?

The stress of owning and/or running a business is enough to make almost anyone crazy. It’s also almost enough –and occasionally more than enough– to prompt entrepreneurs, family members, and employees to resort to drugs. Do you ever feel like sometimes the whole world is on drugs?

Just swipe your eyes over some pharmaceutical and alcoholic beverage industry numbers. Scary stuff.

Factor in all the illegal Mexican drug cartel trainloads. Add illegal outputs from Colombia and Brazil and Turkey and Scandinavia and the Orient and thousands of other supply chains around the world. Scarier yet. (Hey, look at the people running our country. Now that’s scary.) Wheee! Drugs all around. And it’s not even Woodstock!

The trouble is that talk like that draws snickers from many, and it’s just not funny. Individual lives, entire families and businesses, whole nations have been wasted and destroyed by drug and alcohol dependency problems that literally drag them out of being in touch with the present here-and-now, into past and future fantasyland.

There are very few things in life more destructive than drug and alcohol dependency –even cancer– because in addition to also being degerative, drug and alcohol addiction that’s not brought on by parental genes and/or birth conditions (e.g. “crack babies”), is a disease that is often the result of (usually unconscious) self-destruct choices.

_________________________ 

If addiction is a struggle of yours, you’re obviously smart enough to be doing something about it, or you wouldn’t be reading this. If it’s someone else’s struggle that you are somehow engaged with, be careful, first of all, that you don’t get sucked into the whirlpool, because it is not a forgiving experience.

Everyone who’s battled addiction (their own or someone else’s) knows that it’s difficult if not completely impossible to be “under the influence” and to own, operate, or manage a business of any kind without “outside” professional help to monitor and guide a structured program of rehabilitation. But shop carefully.

There are a zillion helpful individuals, groups and organizations out there ready to pounce on a tollfree call of crisis and desperation. Unfortunately though –unlike a latex glove– one size doesn’t fit all, and it seems that most of these well-intentioned helpers are, in the end, very limited in what many affected people will allow them to achieve.

Many who say they want help, really don’t want help; they want only to say that they want help! Like trying to stop decay once it starts, addiction carries an ever-increasing degree of both business and social irresponsibility. This quickly disintegrates into a growing sense of apathy for everything except the next drink, the next fix. 

__________________________

In trying to teach me to swim, my father who was a great swimmer, threw me off a motor boat a mile out into the ocean. I failed to learn anything but fear; he had to hire a swimming instructor. I spent many years as a group counselor and stress management trainer, but couldn’t help some of those most in need who were closest to me.

It’s hard to shake off emotional connections when pragmatism and self-discipline are called for.

The bottom line is that if you or someone close needs help with an addiction problem, you/she/he has to be coherent and genuinely dedicated enough to want help, and to go out and find it, and to follow the path. No one else can push anyone into a resource situation that doesn’t fit or feel right, and expect some overnight miracle.

Addiction is a mental, emotional, and physical disease. Just as it takes time to “catch it,” it also takes time to work it out of your system and get rid of it. And some never do. Regardless of caregiver credentials, pedigrees, or intentions, others truly cannot help those who are not willing and eager and able to help themselves.

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 Open minds open doors

 Thanks for visiting.   God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

Guess what today is?

It’s Wedsssdaaaaay!

Wednesday is business panic day.

The orders, checks, and promises that haven’t yet appeared need to be nudged to get them in before the weekend and the house will be crawling with friends, neighbors, and in-laws all weekend so Friday is dead-in-the-water day on the job, which means –YIKES! –the orders, checks, and promises have to be in by tomorrow.

Lions, and tigers, and bears, oh my!

So what’s the short story version? If you’re the typical entrepreneur (I know, there ain’t no such thing, but there are typical entrepreneurial behaviors), you have been running by the seat of your pants (or skirt) so long that you get yourself under water without a snorkel because you simply skip over that ugly time-consuming task of planning.

Then midweek brings crisis . . . brainfreeze without a Slurpee . . . om top of the usual Wednesday collision course, there’s also that REALLY important project you’ve been putting off that needs desperately to get done, and now it has to stay on the back burner for another week. Will there ever be enough time?

Truth? No. There’ll never be enough time. 

And my best educated guess is that most small business owners and operators would almost rather have a tooth pulled than have to sit still for more than 10 minutes to map out a plan for the week every week. But, y’know what? Y’gotta!  Those who take a deep breath, settle into a comfortable chair and plan the week . . . win.

Think of it this way: If your competitors do weekly action plans, and you don’t, they win. If you both do them, you keep the playing field level. If you do them and they don’t, you take the lead. If neither of you do the,, someone else at your heels  surely will, and will surely win.

Ah, but where to start? Start with the old stuff that’s already in the hopper. Hit on it hard as you come out of the box on Monday morning. Make the calls, write the emails, motivate and inspire. Once the old stuff is moving, jump to the new tasks, contacts, ideas that are presently in the works and that need to get pushed into the spotlight.

Save the unexplored concept stuff for last. Yes, you may never get to that last category, but, hey, y;gotta eat, right? As the current Administration in Washington has conclusively proven, hopes and dreams don’t put food on the table. Let the experimental new ideas simmer. This is not the time to back away from what’s in your face.

Keep focused on the here and now as much as possible. List and combine (but chunk up) “to do” items, then prioritize them in order of immediacy. Cross them off with a highlighter (so you can return to see what was completed) as each task gets done. These pages (dated) are worth saving (like a journal), even for tax records.

Fast-paced status report review meetings are best held (with agendas distributed Friday afternoon) as early as possible on Mondays to help map out the week. (Friday is the worst day for this for a hundred reasons). Oh, and if you’re not both feet into the tech business, do it all in writing on pads. Laptops and handhelds distract attention. 

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 Open minds open doors

 Thanks for visiting.    God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

I grew up with unreasonable demands being made on me and my brother and my mother by my alcoholic father. I began thinking that that was life, and all the other stuff that came my way from teachers and coaches and bigger older kids was just more of the same. So were the demands of college, grad school, and parttime jobs. Or so at least it all seemed.

The more I kept inside, the

tighter, more withdrawn

and resentful I became.

Ever feel that way yourself, or am I just imagining? Don’t we all hold onto some kind of resentment? If it has to do with responsibility, maybe it knots up our shoulders. If it’s a love relationship, it may give us chest pains or heartburn, sadly sometimes heart attacks and heart disease.

Some experience “butterflies” in their stomachs, pains in their lower backs, or legs. We get headaches when oxygen and blood flow get sidetracked from traveling freely through our necks and end up like crimped garden hoses. We run to surgeons and chiropractors and massage therapists and drugstores and liquor cabinets for relief.

Did you ever have such an explosive feeling inside that you wanted to scream, but you ended up instead making some feeble guttural sounds, swallowing the wrong way, coughing or choking, or perhaps you simply stuffed food down your throat because it’s hard to express how you feel when your ability to speak is blocked with food?

All of these symptoms and often not-such-good solutions are magnified for small business owners and managers. Besides all the everyday life stresses of family and friends, small business owners and managers cannot leave their workday traumas at their workday worksites. Doing business 24/7 is what life is about. Entrepreneuring takes guts!

When you own or run a business,

you even dream about it!

If someone insults a corporate or government guy at work–and hopefully this is a rare or never occurrence–he may feel resentful and carry it around, or dismiss it, or confront it. Insults are standard daily fare, however, for many if not most small businesses, and the pressure is enormous to not dismiss it or confront it reactively. 

“Trading insults” leaves us with more insults than we started with!

By reacting insread of responding, it will surely come back to haunt

because only reacting opens the floodgate to OVER-reacting! 

So if all of that is the valley of darkness,

how do we rise up into the light?

Well, here’s how I did it. Try this little recipe.

You might pleasantly surprise your SELF! 

First is to acknowledge that we harbor resentment and identify what circumstances or to whom we attach the ill feelings. Next is to take some deep breaths to better circulate that oxygen and blood flow. Then ask ourselves if it’s really worth hanging onto the upset feelings and to what ends or purpose?

Is it worth “hanging on” in exchange for the bitterness to take its toll on our one and only bodies that we want to have usher us into long happy and healthy lives? Take some more deep breaths. Are you so stubborn that you’re willing to give up years of life in exchange for not being a big enough person to forgive? Isn’t it time to move on?

Watch how good your body starts to feel when you finally agree to answer those questions honestly and let go of that resentment you’ve been harboring all these many days, weeks, months, years.   

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 Open minds open doors.

 Thanks for visiting.  God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

“I am me . . . 

in all the world,

there is no one else

exactly like me.

I am okay!”

 — World renown family therapist VIRGINIA SATIR

[What? You came here looking for that all-time great 56-year-old recording hit “Only You,” by the Platters?]

People around you may sometimes prompt you to think –because you own or run or manage a small business or professional practice– that you are Mr. or Ms. (or Dr.) Awesome in the flesh. And perhaps that’s warranted, especially if you are what’s commonly referred to as “self-made,” in which case: congratulations!

If, however, you can’t even begin to think about your business success because right now you’re down there in the trenches with America’s other 29,999,999 small business owners who are struggling to survive the fanatical progressive/socialist/liberal agenda that has steered government into a trample-free-market-competition mode.

Then the time has come to step back and take personal stock of who you are and where you’re going. And I’m sorry to tell you I can’t help you with where you’re going; only you know that answer. Godspeed!

So let’s explore the real you, the only you, the you that only your inner circle of family and friends knows. I can help you with that. I have lots of experience guiding people (especially business people) to find themselves. It’s not always easy. Some entrepreneurs thrive on making themselves be needles in a haystack.

Begin with accepting the awareness that you are unique.

There is (if you check with your friendly local DNA expert, and as Virginia Satir’s quote above says), no one else exactly like you.

Next, consider that if in fact this is true for every human on Earth, then HOW employees and customers respond to the messages you put out is never exactly the same twice.

Now that should tell you something right off the bat. What you want others to know about you, your products and services is very likely to be not what they are getting from your messages. But let’s return to you.

Government has cultivated dependency among the brain-dead, who make themselves too busy with life to bother with work. Who needs a job when you can get it all (food, shelter, clothing, healthcare, education) for free? There are others who work just enough to get by, but most of them seem to have RDD (Responsibility Deficit Disorder).

You are not among those who live off of others or you wouldn’t be reading this.

But some questions for you are in order: Do you choose to make yourself too busy with work to live life? Is it essential to your survival or are your business priorities simply wrapped around “what if” worries? Do you take enough breaks and pat yourself on the back enough for the good things you do? Do you eat and sleep right?

Have you ever “almost died”?

Do you get enough exercise? Are you answering these questions truthfully? Do you realize that because you are unique, so are your needs, so is your activity level, so is your spunk and gumption, so is your faith, your sense of patriotism, and your entrepreneurial spirit? When did you last stop to think about those values and variables?

What can you do right now to give your unique self a boost?

We do, in fact, become what we think about. Have you been thinking about what you really want to become, or have you been preoccupied with being the person you think others want you to be? There’s no such thing as working smarter and not harder. The issue is one of balance. There is a way that you already know . . . and, there is prayer.      

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 Open minds open doors.

 Thanks for visiting.  God bless you. 

  Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

Business and personal

courage come in as many

different packages as there

are people on Earth

 To decide to live (personal or business) instead of to die takes courage. Being brave enough to step up conscious effort far surpasses the alternative of choosing to give up, give in, quit. Choosing death (personal or business) takes no inner strength, no conviction, no belief, no sense of self-worth, no guts. Yet both choices have their advocates, don’t they?

~~~~~~~~

I know many who have chosen life over death in spite of suffering:  and they are my heroes —  all of them!

I have unfortunately also known some who have simply chosen to die rather than fight to live and face the reality of their fantasies. We are rarely aware of these poor souls living among us in our work settings, neighborhoods, and families… until they bring us great sadness! 

How –after all— do we assess someone’s gumption? Isn’t gumption a (if not the) key attribute of courage?

Maybe we’re not consciousness-raised enough to tune in to others’ plights, or perhaps it’s just too overwhelming to think about? One need not be a shrink in order to sift through some obvious clues. Great amounts of ongoing, chronic, pain can often be a quit-life sign. Overall failure to adjust attitude or to respond instead of react are others.

Don’t go running around now trying to psychoanalyze your employees and family. Thoughts presented here are simply meant to trigger some awarenesses and prompt some introspection.

Perhaps the biggest and most dramatic difference between those who choose life over death has to do with whether people live most of their lives in the mentally and emotionally unhealthy “then and there” past, or the “if and when” future, vs. the far healthier and happier conscious stability of “here and now” present moment reality. 

Mental and emotional good health –even with physical suffering– means paying attention to and appreciating every present “what’s happening” moment as much of the time as possible. It means authenticity. It means seeing and hearing and responding to what’s right in front of one’s face. It’s Gestalt.

Do past and present ever come into play? Of course. We’re human.

Gestalt thinking and practice recognizes that past and future indulgences have value when they’re managed from the present. Past memories, for instance, can have a great soothing effect and enormous learning value. Future thinking is essential to survival because we must all plan and schedule.

The trick is to constantly work at keeping focused on the here and now. Generally, the more someone has one foot grounded in the existing real time world, the healthier she or he is apt to be, and the better prepared he or she will be to live (and continually choose to live) a rewarding and meaningful, make-a-difference life. 

How to get to the point of maximizing life requires some major letting go of behaviors that may be comfortable in favor of taking new pathways. And that bit of transition and personal growth takes courage.

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Hal@Businessworks.US  

  Open minds open doors. 

 Thanks for visiting.

   Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

When’s your statute 

 of limitations run out 

for non-financial debts?

Have you exceeded your limits? What are they? Have you exceeded your expectations? How much do you owe to whom? (Gratefulness, not money!) What’s preventing you from being grateful? Laziness? Ambivalence? Dumbness? Heart of stone?

Have you chosen for the passage of time to max out your ability to say, “thank you”? There are some immediate gratification lessons to be learned on Twitter. Just watch how fast people thank one another! 

Now, this next statement will send accountants and tax attorneys over the edge of the cliff (a good beginning you say?) because “appreciation”and “interest” have such different meanings:

Appreciation has no compound interest attached . . . except by the receiver.

It (“appreciation”) is just a way of expressing gratitude.

I recently received an email from a former student of some 30+ years ago, who said she had tracked me down on Google, and had thought often during her career what an important influence I had been as her professor.

She told me she had been highly successfully specializing in the subjects she had originally studied with me. She knew, she said, a great many years had passed, but she just wanted to say “thank you!” and let me know how valuable my teaching had been.

Do you know what a million dollars feels like? For me, that was it! But only, mind you, because I’m still alive. Imagine if the email never…

Maybe the idea of a response time ceiling on non-financial debt is not in any one’s best interest. Maybe it’s a good idea to read that last sentence again?

When we put off saying thank you, we lose credibility or we put ourselves in the category of being unworthy, or we’re simply forgotten about. Is that a place we want to be? Is that a place we want our businesses to be?

Does it –in the long run– cost us positive growth opportunities to be considered unworthy or not credible or unappreciative? By internalizing accumulated expressions of gratitude, instead of being timely, could it cost us some stress? Health? Hmmm. Thank you for your visit! 

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  Open minds open doors. 

 Thanks for visiting and God bless you. 

   Make today a GREAT day for someone! 

When you carry a grudge

. . . there’s no room to

carry your business!

The old Dutch proverb and German expression,“Vee grow too soon oldt, und too late shmart” sums up much of why we fail miserably to fully understand and effectively cultivate relationships. Our seeming inability to let go of the angry feelings someone close to us once provoked has toppled many business ventures, even entire empires.

                                                                                       

But, ah, the ability to forgive and forget those who crossed us up is a choice. 

And the consequences of making or not making that forgive-and-forget choice are the differences between:

• Having peace of mind, plus the energy to pursue both business and personal success–because by letting go and moving on, you are marshaling your energy and exercising control of you, captaining your own ship.

VS.

• Suffering a permanent or recurring headache that’s potentially terminal to you and your enterprise– because by holding on, you are wasting energy and choosing to subject yourself (and ultimately your business) to someone else’s control.

Carrying a grudge is

what leadership is not!

Many of us carry more grudges than we are probably conscious of. We keep them in our throats, and they come out as guttural utterances when certain names or circumstances surface. We keep them in little invisible knapsacks in our brains that send a flood of upset feelings into our nervous systems whenever they’re unzipped.

Some people get tight chest muscles (love relationships), tight shoulders (related to responsibility), backaches (associated with memories), stomach flutters, fists, headaches, leg pains, shortness of breath, indigestion, diarrhea, constipation, toothaches . . . it’s called being over-stressed, and it’s debilitating. For an entrepreneur, it can kill.

Ask any cardiologist.

Stress is both physical and emotional. It can be good (like the stress that keeps you sitting up straight in a chair), or bad (DIS-stress!), like the level that produces symptoms such as those in the earlier paragraph. Carrying a grudge, having revengeful feelings, like uncontrollable anger or road rage, can be a self-destruct path of no return.

Recognizing that letting go is a choice may not make doing it any easier, but that –itself– is also a choice. You can choose to make it easier. You can also ease the process by practicing more deep breathing and/or by taking a yoga or meditation program. Doctor-sanctioned serious exercise, like daily jogs and brisk walks can also help.

Think of it this way–

Every minute of your life that’s consumed by harboring angry or frustrated or disappointed feelings about another person (even, and perhaps especially, family!), or entity or event or policy is a minute you will never get back, and it’s a minute that you are choosing for someone or something else to reach inside your brain and control your thoughts.

And you are facilitating that impossibility to happen. After all, no one else can really control what you think and how you behave, except you . . . unless you choose for that to happen.

Now, why would you want to do that?

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Hal@Businessworks.US 

  Open minds open doors.

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