ARE YOU ALL YOU HAVE?

You can hire (even borrow) others

 but you can only bank on your self!

Whether you function out of a home closet, garage, kitchen table, 100,000 sq. ft. factory or warehouse, a fancy corporate center, a retail storefront, or a truck, it’s one thing to find people or a person you can trust to help you with your business, and quite another to translate that find into responsibility you can bank on.

Reality check: No matter how much you love someone who works for you, no matter how conscientious an employee may be, you are ultimately the one who has everything on the line, and you are the only one who has to answer to investors, lenders, suppliers, and — in the end — customers.  

Short of turning to your family (and even that rarely works), it’s probably close to 100% true that people only accept responsibility commensurate with what they think is merited by their compensation. In other words, only business owners and partners practice an ownership sense of responsibility. This goes beyond turning off lights and taking out the garbage.

If you’re not ready to make your support team owners/partners, then consider these options:

• Teaching others to have ownership attitudes and sense of responsibility is not the same as cultivating it or making it happen.
  • Leadership by example is one way.
  • Small frequent rewards is another.
  • Reliance on Maslow’s Hierarchy as a guide for rewarding people at their need level is yet another.

# # #

 302.933.0116          Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Stop trying to cut

the wrong corners! 

If you’re like many others who run a business these days, you are being extremely careful with operating expenses and have turned a deaf ear to literally any kind of investments. With respect to that attitude, I’ve heard that if something can go without saying, don’t say it, but I’ll say it anyway:

It’s great to be careful with your money for however much longer it takes government to figure out that small businesses, not monster corporations, are the ones that create jobs, and the ones that will turn the economy around (a year or two or three?).

But it’s not great to turn yourself into Scrooge McSkinflint with every cost that comes your way, especially professional outsourcing fees!. 

When you turn outside your enterprise to hire an expert consultant or performer — writer, designer, accountant, lawyer, staff trainer, turn-around specialist, management coach, programmer, architect, engineer, marketing whiz all come to mind — it’s because you’ve come to realize you can’t do it all yourself, that nobody is really qualified “in house,” and that you need some proven experience.

So there should be little question of value here, unless you haven’t done your homework screening prospects. Remember these are people whose entire lives are devoted to practicing the specialty you need help with. Professionals.

Bringing professional help to bear on your business needs, or to accelerate performance faster than it’s possible to do on your own, is not a decision that should be made lightly, but — once it’s made:

1)  Don’t expect outside providers to tell you how they’ll meet your needs or solve your problems as part of your selection process in order to have their services considered for meeting your needs or solving your problem (unless you pay them for that time and effort).

Do you give away time, talent, products and services to someone who says she or he might be interested in dealing with you

Professionals who are treated

professionally respond professionally.

2)  Don’t try to cut corners on fees because you’ll only be cheating yourself. Outsource consultants and performers deliver what they’re paid to deliver.

The old adage is true that you get what you pay for. If you truly can’t afford the expertise, don’t pretend you can and then haggle on price…unless you want to haggle on the results!

Outside professionals will not be upset with you wanting to cut a deal, as long as it’s a reasonable win-win arrangement.

When instead of $1,000 fee for a task, you try to nickel-and-dime it down to $500, even if you win, you lose; you’ll get $100 worth of effort. 

On the other hand, offering to pay $500 instead of $1000 with a measurable performance incentive of an additional $1000 is the kind of deal that will usually merit some good faith consideration. And isn’t it always worth paying one-X extra when someone’s efforts produce two-X extra? 

There are many places where it’s in your best interests to be a tightwad when reviewing your overhead and operations expenditures, but hiring proven, experienced, professional expertise is not one of them. I’ve been on both sides of the fence hundreds of times. People who reward performance well get exceptional performance.

www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

The Business That “Glows”

Together Grows Together

NO, power plant jokes aside, this is not just an empty little quick-fix message for entrepreneurial leaders, business owners, managers, and sales professionals.

First, it’s not “empty.” Second, it’s not “little.” Third, it will fix stuff quick, but it’s not a “quick-fix” remedy. And fourth, it’s not limited to  entrepreneurial leaders, business owners, managers, and sales professionals.

It’s something for everyone. In fact, please do share it with your family!

YES, like the classic stress management post take some deep breaths — this message works for families and friends as well as bosses and employees. No age limits, health restrictions, or strings attached. And, by the way, no charge.

Do some little thing that you usually

do every day in a different way…and

 see what you learn about your SELF. 

You typically start your daily shower, scrubbing under your left arm? Start under your right instead. Decide how it feels to be changing your routine. You usually travel the exact same route to work or school or a transit hub? Take a different route tomorrow. Note to yourself how it feels. What do you experience that’s different? New?

Perhaps you run straight to your emails or leave them until the evening? Try bunching them up a half hour before lunch and a half hour before quitting time. You’ll be more likely to make quick decisions and quick responses and not get tangled up with them for hours 

Why does any of this matter?

• Because the more you learn and can know about your SELF, and why you do and say the things you do, what feels right, what feels comfortable, and why, the more effective you will be at dealing with other people and interruptions and unplanned-for events (sounds like most of life?). Guess what the end-product is? Doesn’t self-discovery make you glow?                                                                  
• Because the more you can prompt yourself in small, seemingly insignificant ways to try new behaviors, new ideas, new directions, the more you are priming the pump in your brain to think and act more innovatively. Guess what the end-product is? Doesn’t being more innovative make you glow?                                                                             

In other words, changing your physical behavior — even just a tiny bit — can produce a tiny jolt in your brain that opens up some place where you have a crimped hose that is preventing free flow of information that can be holding back those great performances you are capable of, and those great smiles you have that you too often store in some closet.

You have the ability to make things happen for yourself every day, but are probably choosing to have other stuff get in your way. You might not be consciously making that kind of choice, but you can consciously choose to explore a new path or two. You can consciously choose to make more of the kind of difference in life you’ve always wanted to, instead of just talking or thinking about it.

When you choose to work at putting more glow inside yourself, you automatically transmit it to those you are responsible for leading —  and they will rise to the occasion more often and more productively. The business will glow. The business will grow.    

www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

A business wallowing

in its own culture is 

rapidly irrelevant, and  

moving toward extinction.

(Yet corporate giants need it to survive!) 

I just read somewhere (Twitter?) that “Company culture is the priority” for some business organization whose name I’ll withhold to spare them embarrassment. I never heard of the company, but no doubt it is either part of some corporate giant sprawl or, sadly, some idealistic young tech business that is tripping over its own inexperience.

Any company that devotes its priorities to promoting, maintaining, nurturing, and protecting its own culture is totally out of touch with the realities of doing business in 2010. Admittedly, “never forgetting where you came from” is a healthy, driving energy force for every business owner, but dwelling on it is exactly what is wrong with the ways corporate giants conduct business today.

If your business is not customer-centric in every application possible, it is headed toward the great business burial grounds up in the clouds. Developing pie-in-the-sky programs to attract and keep top industry performers is a waste of time and money unless you totally lack the leadership it takes to foster and cultivate top performance from within.

The short solution:

Stop wasting so much energy on trying to inbreed specific employee characteristics and allegiances at a time when the only ROI you’ll realize will be major deficits (you remember him?).

If you’re not running some incompetent government agency, heavily subsidized corporate entity, or dreamy-eyed inexperienced new venture, don’t think of a culture focus as your bailout.

Here’s the bottom line: You cannot focus on your company’s culture AND on serving your customers exceptionally enough to earn ongoing profits AT THE SAME TIME. There’s simply not enough hours in the day to devote your concerted efforts in both directions simultaneously. If you haven’t a treasure chest in the closet, stick to pleasing your customers.

What was it Abe Lincoln said about not being able to please all of the people all of the time? Yes, some self-absorbed employees will jump ship who are not catered to, but do employees who come to work with a daily “what’s in it for me” attitude do your business any good to start with?

Did you go into business to cater to employees or to cater to customers? Sure, employee recognition and motivational performance incentives are nice, warm, fuzzy actions. But don’t let them get in the way. If you do a good enough job of pleasing customers, you will automatically please employees as well…at least those who matter to your business.

Those employees who are intrinsically challenged to be outstanding performers, who want to build their careers on achievement will rise to the opportunities you provide when you set the example.

Teach them how to embrace your customer base, instead of constantly pandering to their requests for more social activities.  

Is that a thin line? Perhaps. Yet, business owners who understand communications, and who practice leadership by example, and management by wandering around, can substantially reduce the need for many employee recruitment and reward devices because they create an environment all by themselves that make others gravitate to serve their pursuits. Voila! “Counter Culture”!

Put the spotlight on the customer and teach employees how to focus it, how to keep it shining and how to change the bulb when necessary, then reward them for how well they do what they do instead of for the promises of their smiles behind their resumes.

We need only look briefly at the complete financial losses attached to professional sports team owners who buy into promises of greatness vs. those who make the long term investments of cultivating from within. A great team culture doesn’t matter if you can’t perform in the clutch.

www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Write that book!

Sing that song!

Change that battery!

Txt that msg!

There is no such thing as the right or wrong

time to take a step on your own behalf.

You are after all, the only one who will take a step on your own behalf. Oh, you no doubt have others who will get up to bat for you, and fill in when you’re preoccupied or not around. But –in the end– you are the only one who understands you (or has the potential to) and the only one with a clear vision of your business pursuits.

That translates to you needing to cultivate, practice, and boost your Action Attitude daily. Having a bias toward action doesn’t mean you need to adhere to some maniacal schedule of rushing from one thing to another 25 hours a day (and the clue to whether you fit this madman-paced lifestyle is wishing that you had 25 hours in a day!).

Making an Action Attitude be as important an ingredient in your life and your business pursuits doesn’t mean always being on your toes; it means always thinking on your toes.

Except perhaps during a ceremony, a religious service, or on the line of scrimmage before the ball is snapped, some action is always better than no action! 

Having a bias toward action means always thinking and deciding in favor of forward motion regardless of delays or disarming or frustrating circumstances. It means never being lazy, except maybe on vacation. Action combined with trust is the foundation for leadership that makes a difference. 

No one travels to happiness or success by standing still. Why? Well, besides the obvious, it’s worth remembering the basic tenet of Gestalt-based teachings, that happiness IS the journey and success IS the journey. It is not a place to end. It is the process of getting there. We make that process happy and successful by having an Action Attitude.

I recently read someone’s business mission which stated in part, “Success starts with education followed by motivation.”

Not in this lifetime. Not in this country. And certainly not in the business world.

Success starts with an Action Attitude.

And as we all know from stories of the world’s greatest entrepreneurs, that their accomplishments had very little –if anything– to do with education.

Now, don’t all you teacher-types go getting your bowels in an uproar. I consider myself an educator as well as a writer and business coach. I taught part and full time college for 13 years. I designed and delivered management training workshops for 20 years. Educational achievements have little to do with life or business success.

My happiest and most successful students were typically lousy test performers with great drive, ambition, and a burning desire to make their ideas succeed. Most dropped out of formal classes and worked their way into experience levels that they parlayed into building and growing their own enterprises. Most have made a real difference in business, and with charitable contributions.

Winners don’t dwell on either the starting line OR the finish line. They pay attention to concentrating on each step they take. So having an Action Attitude means first and foremost being tuned in to “the here and now” present moment, every passing moment, as much as possible, throughout as many waking hours as possible, each day.

It is an Action Attitude focus that produces meaningful

and satisfying lives and productive, rewarding businesses.

931.854.0474 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Seeing Yourself Win

At Business,

Makes It Happen!

(And when you can make it happen, you can make a difference!)

Yes, business is a game.And let’s face it, there’s probably never been a more exasperating, more struggling time in American history than right now to try and launch or rocket-boost a business. The economy is in shambles and continues to sink daily.

It is unfortunately only going to continue to get worse until something more substantial than lip-service is paid to the stimulation of small business job creation. This will take real and significant tax incentives extended to entrepreneurs. Small businesses that have been laying around for years are the economy’s engines, but new entrepreneurial enterprises are the fuel!

New businesses create jobs. Job creation is (for the zillionth time on this blog site) the ONLY solution to our ever-sinking economy.

The Administration lacks business experience and knowhow to the point of patheticness (even if there’s no such word, that’s what it is). 

To have even thought that “stimulus” (tax dollar) money for corporate giants was the answer, is both naive and dumb.

To think that the nonstop reckless spending patterns being flaunted by government, and that politically-motivated tax increase and ill-conceived healthcare proposals represent an answer, is pure lunacy. They simply serve to compound the financial collapse of those very businesses that hold the key to revitalization.

How does an entrepreneur with a new venture face employee healthcare requirements and increased taxes with every innovation that has the potential to create jobs?

Competitive businesses (are there any other kind?) are beating each other’s brains in. Strategic alliances and collaborative efforts have made valiant efforts to rise above the fray — trying to cooperate, lock arms, hold hands, and march shoulder-to-shoulder was a nice diversion as times got tighter, but those are just new game applications. They don’t change the basic free-market-enterprise-doing-business-to-make-a-profit game!

And what else is business for but to innovate, create jobs, and make a profit?

Social reform? Sure, that’s great when it’s affordable.

History has proven at every turn that social causes underwritten by businesses that stand solidly on strong financial foundations are more successful than those causes underwritten from a position of weakness.

How can you truly help less fortunate people and causes when you are struggling to pay your own bills? Charity must come from the heart, but effective large-scale charity must also come from financial strength.

The bottom line remains that it takes sales to produce revenues and it takes revenues to pay overhead and open the door to profits. The problem with all this is that government controls strangle business sales initiatives. And corporate bailouts were a failure-ready-to-happen before they ever happened. Their sole accomplishment was to increase the deficit by adding more debt.

What options are left? If you own or run a new business (since 2001), your best option is to make a winner of your business by seeing it be a winner every day and every night, every waking hour possible (after personal, family, spiritual and community time).

That means closing your eyes and “seeing” the customers you want coming in your door or to your site. It means imagining each growth step taking place, including employee loyalty and leadership development, bank deposits being made, bill payments becoming a minor event, investments in operations and job creation zooming. Then, fully supporting the charity of your choice.

Every great athlete and sports psychologist will tell you that seeing yourself in your mind as a winner, doing winning things in winning ways, produces victory. It’s no different for business owners, except there may be more diversions to deal with. But when all is said and done, you become what you think about, and so does your business!

Try it. Be Tenacious. You’ll like it. It works. 

# # #

931.854.0474     Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals!

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Loose Lips DO Sink Ships . . .

When to keep your

mouth shut, and how.

You’re a self-confident entrepreneur, maybe even cocky. The likelihood is that you have a high sense of self-esteem and a big fat ego that sometimes gets in the way of your success —  an ego that you find yourself tripping over every once in awhile.

Your $50-necktie-and-$100-white-shirt corporate brother-in-law thinks you’re a smart-ass know-it-all. The guy you’ve been busting a gut trying to get business from can’t get past the fact that you’ve been everywhere, done everything, and have the same amount (or more) experience that he has. People who work for you start to yawn when you begin ticking off your accomplishments.

“A time for everything under heaven”

is true for sure.

But believing it and acting it

may be two separate issues.

How hard is it to keep your mouth shut when a customer, prospect, employee, or supplier starts offering an opinion on something you see differently, based on your firsthand knowledge?

Do you shut down your listening skills because you’re in a hurry to impress the other person that you already know the details, the scoop, the inside story, the whatever?

If any of this sounds even vaguely familiar, you may be setting yourself up for failure. Consider that no one likes to be upstaged. No one likes not being heard or paid attention to.

Try asking questions instead of offering opinions. Remember that true entrepreneurs who start and run successful ventures seek always to find others smarter than they are to run and manage their operations 

Surely you’ve heard some grandparent

warn a child to “hold your tongue!”

It’s actually very good and often productive advice. Try putting the tip of your tongue against the roof of your mouth (it’s very hard to speak coherently that way) when someone else starts in on a subject about which you consider yourself well-informed.

It will force you to pay attention and wait. It will force you to take the time to present your ideas in a less offensive, more productive manner.       

If someone else is trying to impress you, it almost always means that that person is already impressed with you.

If the exchangeis a potentially good one for either and/or both of you, tolerance may get you more respect than rebuttals or one-upmanship. Respect generates trust and cooperation and sales. Information presented in a way that others might interpret as bragging does not.

Leadership is about balance.

Balanced communications is the magic combination that opens the lock. Listening, active listening — eye contact, nodding, expressing agreement and understanding, asking for examples and diagrams, questioning instead of telling and offering opinions, paraphrasing, taking notes, showing genuine interest and concern — are leadership behaviors that create balance. 

Anytime you’re tempted to pounce on a discussion topic with with a tsunami of personal experience, supportive data, resource recommendations, evidence you consider conclusive to support your position . . . STOP! Ask yourself if you are more interested in impressing someone with how much you know or are capable of, than you are with growing or boosting your business.

When you can respond instead of react,

you can never over-react!

302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Daily Notes or Recordings

Work Wonders With

Business Pursuits 

They heal damaged ventures and egos. They explore new ideas and avenues of strategic planning. They reveal new awarenesses and cultivate creativity. They stimulate innovation and fuel productive relationships.

They save time, money and effort. They reduce stress and soothe neurological systems.They need never be shared with anyone. They don’t take more than 3-5 minutes a day.

No, “They” are not vitamin supplements or exercises or illusionist tricks. “They” are journals. When you keep a journal, you open yourself up to all of the above opportunities.  

Do they REALLY work? Yes. I have dozens of business (and personal) journals on my shelf. Referring to them and the notes I’ve made has accomplished everything noted in the opening paragraph, and more.

A great many college and management training session students I’ve prescribed journaling to, have told me it was the single most valuable tool they ever learned about and used. It can be a combination savior and rocket booster for any entrepreneur or small business owner or manager. It can be a major career and personal/professional development tool for anyone, regardless of business attachments. 

The best part of keeping track of my daily thoughts in writing –besides teaching me more about myself and my life and business choices– is that once thoughts leave my brain and travel down my arm and into my fingers and through my pen and onto paper, I no longer need to carry them around in my brain.

Once my thoughts are sitting in a notebook that I can pick up and look at anytime I want; there’s more room in my brain for focusing on what’s important that’s going on here and now (instead of recreating and resurrecting past experiences or worrying about or planning for or fantasizing about stuff that’s in the future, and that may never happen or show up anyway).

I can tell you firsthand that there’s no better investment of time you can make, over time. And your potential ROI paybacks can be staggering. On top of all that, it’s free!

Getting started . . .

1) Make the commitment to yourself that you will try it faithfully for 21 days in a row.

2) On every left-hand page, put the date. Across the top write “WHAT HAPPENED” and proceed to jot down an objective, rational, report of some incident(s) that occurred or thoughts or ideas you had.

3) On every facing right-hand page, write across the top “HOW I FELT” and proceed to editorialize, offer opinions, be biased, express your “take” on whatever is represented on the left-hand page.

What kinds of entries work best . . .

An idea. A thought. An observation. A word. A sentence. A paragraph. A diagram. An example. A poem. A drawing. Scribble. Your goals. Goal progress. A doodle. Spit. A coffee stain. Whatever is taking up valuable think space that you don’t want to forget, but that’s getting in the way of immediacy.

Does it have to be in writing? Can’t a laptop serve the purpose? Historically, writing stuff down on paper has always worked best. Tape recordings are next best. Laptops do not offer the same impact value. I really recommend to put it in writing on paper in a (preferably) bound blank book or (second best) bound notebook. (“Bound” because removable pages encourage time-wasting second thoughts, and nurture perfectionism, which is not productive.)

Stop worrying about how pages will look and put stuff down. Something (literally any thing) every day is better that writing volumes once or twice a week.

Keeping track of your daily thoughts may feel awkward at first, but reviews over time will prove that you have created true value from nothing, and serve to demonstrate how really smart you always thought you were but never had a way to back up your convictions. And who knows? Maybe it will end up a best-seller or full-length movie! :<)

Serious: Do it. Start today.

www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

Disagreements are

triggered by real or

perceived threats,

 injustices, and

unmet expectations.

If you’re not seeking a win-win result,

you lose. If, however, you are seeking for

both sides to walk away winners, check this…

Here’s a helpful checklist of steps to keep handy as you seek to negotiate your way through any disagreement with another person or group of people. Following these guidelines can help to disarm real or perceived threats, injustices, and unmet expectations by putting it all on the table and by facilitating (with pleasant assertiveness) forward movement…on the job, or off: 

1)   BOTH SIDES MUST ACCEPT

that the responsibility for striking up a successful relationship, or renegotiating a pre-existing one, is shared.

“Before we set out to produce a useful contract, we both (all) need to accept and act from a position of 50-50 ownership.”  

2)   A FREE, UNRESTRICTED ATTITUDE

must prevail. Agreements that are manipulated or coerced will not last. Those who do not freely choose to agree are not ready to contract with others at any level.

“Before we build this bridge over troubled waters, let us (all) agree to not exert any external stresses on the materials we use, the time we decide on, the people and equipment we choose to do the job, or the costs involved”

3)   BOTH SIDES MUST BE WILLING

 to give fair consideration to one another’s situations, circumstances, opinions, assertions, evidence, concerns, experience, skill, knowledge, and financial and physical and spiritual limitations. Even boss-employee relationships cannot produce something from nothing.

“I’m happy to give you the benefit of some extra hours (days) off if you are willing to put the extra effort in that we need right now, and can get the job done the right way on schedule.”

4)   ANYTHING ANYBODY WANTS

is legitimate. It may not be desirable, advisable, or affordable, but there’s nothing wrong with expressing desires (that are, of course, legal and nonviolent).

“You want a hundred million dollars for this land assessed at $900,000? Okay, you’re entitled to want that.”

5)   Remember the song: “YOU CAN’T ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU WANT” ?

It’s true, and that’s okay too!

6)   YOU CAN CHOOSE TO REFUSE.

You may not want to deal with the consequences of refusing, but you can always simply say “No!”

7)   THE ONLY DEAL ITEMS 

you can put on the table are behavior, results, time and money. Attitudes and emotions cannot be contracted for.

8)   IF YOU OR THE OTHER PARTY

doesn’t have or is unable to provide something, don’t waste time and energy seeking it.

9)   PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT PRESENT

cannot be contracted with.

10)  PUT IT IN WRITING. PUT IT IN WRITING. PUT IT IN WRITING.

11)  BUILD IN  “What Happens If” CONTINGENCY ARRANGEMENTS.

Always take the time to consider “worst case scenario” possibilities. 

12)  MAKE SURE TO SET UP A WAY TO MEASURE PROGRESS.

It’s hard to know where you’re going if you don’t know where you’ve been.   

This adaptation was inspired by a 1985 guideline “When You’re Negotiating” published by Designed Learning, Inc.

302.933.0116    Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

When tug-of-wars threaten 

family business . . .

call TIME OUT!

Not to act is to act… Not to stop the roller coaster long enough to raise the issues (and question yourself), puts you out of control!

Conflict is inevitable in any business. But eliminating conflict can destroy a business overnight because it pulls away the blanket of trust and blocks the path to innovation all in one fell swoop.

The goal needs to be to manage conflict productively, not chase it away. Properly managed conflict can breed creative thinking, mutual respect, and boost business growth.

If you want to get technical, some organizational development experts and behavioral scientists would insist that the inability to manage agreement is a far more critical issue to address than the inability to manage conflict.

Experience with hundreds of family businesses though seems to dictate that where conflict is present, manage that first. It’s hard to agree to much of anything once fists are flying.

__________________________________________________

Start by questioning yourself >>> What do I need to do when a conflict issue is critically important to me but not to others? >>>Am I inflating or accelerating an issue and making it worse than it really is? >>> How important is it for me (and for me to help others) to speak up, and not “hint”? >>> For issues that are critical to others but not me, can I mediate better with active listening and questioning?

_____________________________________________

Here are some quick-fix rules of thumb that can lead you out of the dark tangles and into the sunlight:

1) Be willing to listen more. Ask the presenter(s) to slow down so you can write down a bullet list of items he/she/they want to deal with (When you do this, you slow down the attack potential and reduce the odds of getting overwhelmed with a bombardment of unrelated issues. When it’s agreed that the list is complete, ask for help prioritizing it, then focus on #1 only until it’s resolved, before moving to #2, etc. Divide and conquer the issues.

2) Stay 100% focused on the issues and on behaviors, not on the individuals themselves or their personality defects or character traits.

3) Resist being defensive or attacking back. Rebuttals only stimulate more rebuttals. Even if you’re right and win the battle, you can lose the war.

4) Be pleasantly direct about expressing what you want and feel. Use assertive language that respects others and their rights, that is objective and clear. More use of words like “I” instead of “you.” If things get heated, call TIME OUT! and follow with statements like “I came here to discuss, not argue” and “I want to know your feelings about this” and “I want to hear your position on this.”

5) Practice substituting the word “and” for the word “but” when trying to work through differences [“I agree with your thinking that we need to increase sales, but I think how that happens should be the responsibility of the sales department” is NOT as effective as “I agree with your thinking that we need to increase sales, and I think how that happens should be the responsibility of the sales department.”] Words like “but” (and “though” and “however” which are simply polite “buts”) serve to discredit…whereas “and” suggests a process of building on a mutually agreeable idea.

To deal effectively with another person’s anger, you must –above all– not get hooked by it.

Second, accept it as belonging to the other person.

Third, affirm the other person’s angry feelings as real, and that you hear and understand them.

Fourth, acknowledge that you may or do feel defensive, and state clearly how you feel about having any anger directed at you.

Fifth, ASK for clarification, for examples, for diagrams; diagnose the cause — take it apart piece at a time.

Sixth, renegotiate the relationship.

And remember what grandma used to say: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

(or call or email Hal -see below- for some free pointers)

Resolving conflicts? It’s always worth doing. It’s your business.

302.933.0911 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

 “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

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